Tag Archives: rockies

The Second In My Series of Hunter-Pence-Inspired Acrostics

Why does Hunter Pence inspire acrostics?  Good question.  I’ll let you know if/when I find out.

How can you predict baseball?

U are just resigning yourself to

Never getting a good deal at the

Trade Deadline, leastways not

Eugenio Velez (irrelevant line, keep moving, guys.)

Right now, in 2012.

 

People have short

Evaluation windows and

No one was absolutely thrilled with Hunter Pence’s

Clutch hitting to start off his career with

Emily’s Giants (because they are Emily’s Giants, aren’t they?)

 

I know I wasn’t and

Some random person on Twitter wasn’t, so…

 

Anyway!

We were all feel kind of downerish about this.

Everyone hates the Dodgers and we needed

Someone to be that difference-maker

Other than Buster Posey, ‘cause he goes without saying

My personal opinion was that Pence was doing fine but

Everyone knows fine is not the same as

 

Absolutely awesome.

Fate intervened!

The Giants were having a seriously up-and-down game today when

Everyone’s (new) favorite Hunter Pence drove home the point that the

Rockies are toast.  (Which means Dan O’Dowd is still welcome for toast and tea at my place.)

 

A homer!  The first in his Giants career!

Let’s all chill out and do yoga or whatever.

Let’s also acknowledge the undeniable fantasticness of Hunter Pence, even aside from that neat little homer.

Diamond Girl

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What, One Can Simply Score More Runs?

I may have said something along the lines of “One does not simply score more runs,” the other day.  My blog is the virtual equivalent of a fascist state, so you can’t confirm whether or not I actually said that.  (Okay, fine.  You can.  That’s what the neat “scroll” feature on your computer is for.)  Anyhows, Friday, it sure looked like it and the Giants went down quietly, 3-0.  Silently.  But then today rolled around and… things were different.

Nine runs, thirteen hits different.  This team has kind of morphed to a point that it’s creepy, except not creepy because it’s completely wonderful.  Actually, still creepy.

Boromir is happy.

A lot of different pieces fell into place.  Matt Cain delivered what was probably his best performance since the perfect game way back in June – June was also, incidentally, the last time a Giant other than Buster Posey hit a homer at home, so there’s that –, Hunter Pence started to look a little bit like the Hunter Pence we know and love and, um, traded our souls to the devil for and Buster Posey kept hitting ‘em homers at home.   Angel Pagan also had a lovely little two-run triple.  He can do everything except, you know, catching a ball in a sensible fashion.

I love the Rockies.  I really do.  If Dan O’Dowd ever comes to the Bay Area to catch a game, I will gladly invite him over for tea and thank him from the bottom of my heart for creating such an, ahem, fun team to play.

Diamond Girl

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Why Zack Greinke Needs a Coffee Maker, The Giants Need to Borrow Busch Stadium and Boromir Needs to Talk To Me

So that was a pretty marvelous road trip.  We’ve all heard about those teams that do well at home but are morbidly bad when they go on the road.  Zack Greinke famously offered up bad hotel coffee as his reason for allowing billions of runs on the road.  The Giants might offer up, oh, a ballpark that is permanently socked in with fog and has walls that stretch all the way to Southern California as their reason for not being able to really ever (never) score runs at home.  Greinke needs to just bring his own coffee maker.  The Giants solution is probably not so simple.  Global warming might help.  I’m not an Inconvenient Truth expert, but that’s not a short-term solution.  It’s going to get warmer before it gets colder and stuff, right?

Suggestion time!

a)      Borrow Coors Field.  Prop up San Francisco so that it’s at altitude.

b)      Borrow Busch Stadium.  Make San Francisco 100 degrees all the time.

c)       Get ridiculously good hitter off of waivers.  Ridiculously good hitter who’s also ridiculously expensive, so nobody else will claim him.  Winning the lottery would also help.  ‘Cause we’re kind of poor right now, according to Sabes et al.

d)      Have Ryan Vogelsong pitch every day.  Then we don’t have to score that many runs.  Any runs.  Ryan VogelALLOWSNORUNS.

e)      Score more runs.  Why am I not a GM, guys?  I have the most brilliant ideas.

They did win 15-0 last night.  They may or may not actually need my suggestions.  They’re kicking off a home series against the Rockies tomorrow night (smiley face – the Rockies, people) and things may very well continue being rosy.  With Brian Sabean’s Brainchild Marco Scutaro in the lineup?  Uh-huh.  This may very well continue being rosy.

Also, I am making frappuccino cupcakes right now so I’ll have more patience with the Giants foibles.  Frappuccino cupcakes make everything better.

Diamond Girl

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When Timmy Got All Zito and Then When We Wished for Just That

I am rarely rendered speechless, but I certainly was last night.  The Giants and Rockies hit like there was no tomorrow, with a final score of 17-8, and the Giants also made cringe-worthy errors like there was no tomorrow.  Not quite sure why you would make cringe-worthy errors if there was no tomorrow, but I obviously do not fully understand the psyche of the Giants just yet.

The game started out disastrously, then looked miraculously wonderful, and then became disastrous all over again.  Despicable Me balloon scene comes to mind.  I optimistically hoped that this year, the Giants would not do any handing-balloon-then-popping-balloon, but apparently not.   I clutched my very delicious orange tea and sniffled over my radio as pitcher after pitcher got shelled and ERAs rose to serious, undeniable danger zone.

Besides all of that, there is Buster Posey’s case of shingles, which is the sort of thing that happens during the Dog Days of August, when everything gets weird, but on April 11th?  Everyone is supposed to be perky and healthy and, you know, getting wins.  Bad luck can’t last forever, though, so I’m just choosing to believe that everyone else is peaking early and our trials now will lead to success later.

And, yeah.  Be the change you want to see in the world.  I am this close to changing my blog name to “Inspirational Quotes Inc.!”

But seriously, if I were going to change my blog name to anything, “Baseball Player’s Haircuts ‘N Things” would probably more appropriate.  Which means, of course, that we need to break down Timmy’s haircut.

I like it.  It suits his long face shape better (I know I talked about this a long time ago, but I can’t seem to find the post at the moment) and changing things up, in a purely non change-up sense, might be just what he needs.  Sure, it didn’t really at all work yesterday, but these sorts of things can take time.  I am from the city with three psychic schools and countless more psychics-for-hire.  I know these sorts of things.

As for the baby giraffe in the room – move over, elephant – there’s his pitching.  There was nothing encouraging about Lincecum’s performance, but I was slightly and strangely encouraged by his quotes afterwards.  From the SF Chronicle: “I don’t think it’s a matter of finding answers per se.  It’s a matter of grinding through it and knowing at some point in the season you’re going to have these.”  This is preferable any day to when Timmy had his Zito phase and went all, “I don’t feel like I’m getting tired. I don’t feel like anything’s broken… I think the key for me is just to get my mental state right and fix what’s going on.”

The irony here, of course, is that if Timmy got all Zito on us right at this moment, we would all rejoice and confetti might very well appear in the skies of San Francisco.  Baseball, you are a very strange game.  Love, Emily.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  I will now allow myself one, “What’s wrong with Timmy?”  Okay.  Done.  Out of my system.  Let’s move on.

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Luckily, I Was Listening to Enya When I Read the Roster News, Plus PREDICTIONS.

So I chose a kind of a weird time to go on vacation.  While some of the biggest decisions in recent Giants-fan memory were coming out, I was walking to and from the pool and kinda-sorta trying for a tan.  (No luck there.)   When I finally started catching up, I started looping my Enya and went to Twitter.  It’s probably a good thing I had the über-calming music going because, well, my jaw pretty much dropped at the initial 25 man news.  And just as I was picking it up off the floor, I read the Chris Stewart news.  I am still attempting to connect jaw to rest of head and it’s not working terribly well.  Whoa, whoa, whoa, for lack of a better way of putting it.  I did not see any of this coming, but I am happy with it, all around.  The Giants are looking pretty young and energized going into Opening Day and what else can you really ask for?  (Other than pre-steroid scandal Ryan Braun starting in left, but hey, you can’t have it all.)

I’m sad to see Chris Stewart go, because I was rather partial to him, but I am also always glad to see guys go the Yankees.  It feels like sending them to a family member’s house, rather than to a complete stranger, to use a slightly strange analogy.  That is my inner New Yorker speaking, don’t mind it.  So in many ways, I’m actually happy for Stewart and wish him safe travels with the Yankees.

Here is my happy waving GIF, because if you don’t laugh, you might cry.  Not that I cry about baseball trades.  Usually.  Let’s not talk Bengie Molina and I’ll be fine.  Don’t get between me and my catchers, people.  People being Brian Sabean.

And now!  I’m a couple hours late this year, but I’m going to do some predictions now.  I like to do them before the season kicks off, but just bear with me.  It’s not like the first few innings of a game give me any edge on the rest of you who predicted a few days ago, so!

 National League

East:  Philadelphia Phillies

Central:  St. Louis Cardinals

West:  San Francisco Giants

Wildcards:  Colorado Rockies, Cincinnati Reds

American League

East:  New York Yankees

Central:  Detroit Tigers

West:  Texas Rangers

Wildcards:   Tampa Bay Rays, Cleveland Indians

See?  No need to worry that I have an edge, prediction-wise.  I am so terrible with ‘em that the timing makes zero difference.  But now I have put them out there and can cringe over them for the next six months or so and it just wouldn’t be baseball season without that.  Have you all made predictions?  Put them (or a link to them) in the comments so we can commiserate/I can get completely jealous of your brilliance.  ‘K?  ‘K.

Happy Pappy Opening Day!

Ever-So-Slightly-Tanned Diamond Girl

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