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Retrospective on The Desperate Ballplayers of San Francisco

I finally watched the season finale of The Franchise on YouTube and I adored this moment. 

(Apologies for the mega-blurry screenshot.  You can see it here at minute 4:25.)

I didn’t adore the fact that D-Ro blew out his wrist.  It was Freddy Sanchez’s expression when he threw his helmet that I adored.  I mean, is that priceless or what?  I’ve always thought it would be terribly awkward to be in the dugout when someone goes off like that, but Freddy honestly just looks scared for his life.  Burrell’s raised-eyebrow expression is kind of hilarious too.  It makes me miss Sanchez even more than before.

Anyhow.  As they reminded us about one million times in the last three minutes of the show, it’s a wrap on it now, so I am giving you all my thoughts from the season of the show.  Are you ready?  No?  Well, here you go, anyway:

*A person is not a “story”!  The incessant talk of Ryan Vogelsong as a “story” drove me i-n-s-a-n-e.

*Barry Zito seems so sad.  The way they wrapped up his story was not inspiring or anything.  Isn’t depressing TV is bad TV?   I mean, you can watch the evening news and see that no one goes by that.  Just my humble opinion on the subject.

*Brian Wilson in obnoxious.  But then, what else is new?

*Freddy Sanchez is utterly adorable.  Matt Cain and Pablo Sandoval, too.  And Jeremy is exactly the kind of father I would have imagined him to be.

*Bruce Bochy cracks me up.  To no end.

*Those meetings with Sabes and Boch and Neukom seriously need someone to enliven them.  A stand-up comedian would work.  Or a girl with a blog with a long name and fourteen inch hair (I measured!).  That would be me.  In case you didn’t realize that.

Overall, I did enjoy the show.  But all that said, I don’t think it was the best they could have done.  I think way too much of it was clips from games and Brian Murphy narrating the season.  If they had taken full advantage of the reality TV format and delved into the clubhouse and on-the-road stuff more, instead of the families and the games, I think it could have been way better.

Remember Life of Brian in his hotel room, way back when?  That rocked. What about on the airplane?   Eating out on the road?  That’s the stuff I want to see.  More than, eh, Ryan and Nicole Vogelsong talking with a- granted, it was pretty, but still- weird backdrop of the city.

It is also worth noting that my thoughts become that much more disjointed on off-days, so I should probably go now.  Doesn’t it feel like ages since we’ve played LA?  And who else watched The Franchise and what were your thoughts?

Diamond Girl

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3 + 3 = 3 Wins + Mandatory Low Point In Trailer When Main Character Cries Or Almost Cries If He Is Tough Guy Brad Pitt So He Can’t Actually Cry

I don’t drop “Baseball Gods” a whole lot.  But when people hit triples, they always feel like little gifts from Baseball Heaven.  And has anyone else noticed that they do tend to come to people who really, really need them?

Like Pat Burrell  who is rumored to be the odd man out later this year and Eli Whiteside who has, well, big shoes to fill.  And he isn’t really fillin’ them.  Then Billy Hall’s (am I coining Billy?) magical half hour with Bam Bam seems to have paid off, which comes at a nice time when Freddy pessimism is at a 2011 high.  I am all for the holistic, natural approach and have (some amount of) total confidence that the shoulder can heal on its own but it’s good to have some, ahem, backup.

Which means that this night of three basers notched MadBum his third win of the year and a 3.21 ERA.  Sometimes I have the urge to bang the heads of the offense together but then I remember that they do things like hit key triples and I go to my punching bag (laptop keyboard) instead.

We are on our way to sweeping the Diamondbacks, which is a phrase I would have been petrified to utter a few days ago.  This is good.

Zito is moving up in the world and will be starting in AAA Fresno tonight.  I guess this must be his first time pitching for the Grizzlies and I think he’ll fit in.  No snarky-ness there.  Barry and Chuckchansi Park just seem like a match made in heaven.  Still, I’d be lying if I said I don’t feel like the clock is ticking down to doomsday.

The first Moneyball movie trailer hit the web yesterday my skepticism about it is fading.

I think it looks really good, actually.  The hairdresser captured Billy Beane’s vaguely volumized hair perfectly and even if they look nothing alike otherwise (yeah, that’s a big cause of mine) they do kind of make the same expressions.

And am I the only one who thinks doing this looks incredibly fun?  Even if that is the mandatory Low Point In Trailer When Main Character Cries (Or Almost Cries If He Is Tough Guy Brad Pitt So He Can’t Actually Cry).  So I don’t think it’s supposed to look fun.  But it does.

Someone else commented that the field looks suspiciously dark in this walk scene and why doesn’t the stadium have any lights?

True.

I will be in the theater opening day, I think.  I’ve only done that for one other movie, Takers, and it was unwarranted.  That was a terrible movie (not to mention Hayden Christensen’s character was the first of the bank robbers to die, which tempted me to demand my $8 back, but that seemed petty).  I have hope, though.  I kind of think this might be my first baseball movie love.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  Congratulations to former Giant/Grizzly Jesus Guzman on his call-up to San Diego!

I remember seeing him during his two weeks up at AT&T Park in 2009 and enjoying watching him play.  Wishing him much success.  I mean, some success.  Enough for him to have a happy career but the Padres to keep on their last place, sub-.500 ways.

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Maybe There’ll Be a Walk-Off Win Tonight. Total Shot In the Dark. And Baseball Players Shouldn’t Design Clothes. And Other Facts of Life.

So does anyone else remember the moment in the Charlie in the Chocolate Factory movie where they’re in the Great Glass Elevator and they fly over a hospital room?  Willy Wonka says, “This is the Puppet Hospital and Burn Center.  It’s… relatively new.”  And then he gives his uncomfortable little laugh.  The reactions?

I’m the Mike Teevee’s father in the equation.  Every time a Giant gets injured, I make that expression.  The, Are you kidding me, you weirdos?

Freddy is on my top 3 favorite Giants list.  I consider him a constant and a sparkplug and the kind of guy who would keep us sane during the injury insanity.  Five seconds and one Brandon Phillips hit later, he’s on the DL.

Maybe we should get the Giants their own hospital…?

Brian Sabean wasted no time in picking up a new second baseman, fueling the “this is really bad” fire.  Bill Hall is the guy, recently designated for assignment from Huston with nearly identical numbers to Pat Burrell, when he came to the Giants last year.  I went to Hall’s Wikipedia and saw the following Awards Highlights.

  • Good Guy Award- 2006
  • Michael Harrison Award (Community Service)- 2004,2006
  • Unsung Hero Award- 2005
  • Pitched a 1-2-3 inning as a utility player- 5/28/2010

Huh.  I love Good Guys.  And the Wiki piece fails to mention that he was the Brewers Team MVP in 2006. Looking at pictures of him in that Brewers uniform is acclimating me to the idea of having him in a Giants uniform.  He is reportedly available to play today in what may be a walk of win (total shot in the dark, there).

No matter what, I just hope Aubrey plays games, from now on, in head to toe armor. 

(Props to the brilliant person at www.arewestillcool.com who mocked this up.)

I also have to say something about the line of Giant-designed jerseys that came out yesterday.  I’m not sure what to say.  Except that I will not be going out to buy one.  They’re hilarious, a little ego-maniacal and I feel like this might be a good time to break out an old blog I wrote but never posted called Baseball Players Shouldn’t Design Clothes and Other Facts of Life.

I mean, really?  The font?  The faded edges of the corny image?

Diamond Girl

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This Changes Everything. Again. Plus Irrational Theories About Chuck Greenberg and Giants Trivia.

It’s been a while, hasn’t it? I’ve missed blogging during this transition and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little skeptical of all the changes (then again, change is inevitable except from vending machines) so if you see some weirdness in the text/format/anything else you can think of, bear with me, will you?

I am not bearing with the Giants. Well, I sort of am. I’m sorely tempted to say that the world is ending, but that isn’t until May 21st, so I’m giving them at least until then.

Firstly, what is up with Ubaldo? I have people in my family who are huge Ubaldo fans and after reading an article about him where he talked about his mother’s cooking in SI, I was kind of converted. I know he’s our NL West rival and everything, but I’m really genuinely curious what’s wrong with him. I mean, he allowed three runs of seven innings today, so he was better, but he just doesn’t look like he’s in first half 2010 form. Any theories? I’ve heard everything from Where’s the closest psych ward? (unfair) to His mechanics are profoundly messed (probably an overreaction).

Anyhow. The important stuff from this game:

DeRosa. J-Sanch. Bochy. Burrell. And Belt. Perhaps. (Are there direct flights from Fresno to Denver? I’m checking my totally great Expedia app.)

DeRosa has been displaying a profound lack of ability to hit and though I’m sure that’s misleading and he’s an awesome baseball player (okay, I’m not sure. Not even close to sure.) is there really time for that? He has the Best Accent In Baseball. There’s tons of voiceover work out there. Where they don’t care if you have a creepy sounding wrist thing going on (wrist phobic person, here).

J-Sanch. Well, he hit. More doubles than Buster on the year. And this one is interrelated to Bochy because it’s the second day in a row that he left in a starter “too long”. Granted, they were different situations. But I’m inclined to take that as a lack of bullpen faith, which is understandable to a point. But then the point ends, you know?

Burrell. Sort of smacked himself into that outfield picture, huh? You probably know I’m not much of a Burrell fan, but he makes more sense as a starting player than late inning replacement, I think. Just like Vogelsong makes more sense in the bullpen, simply because Zito can’t. I don’t think either are lesser roles, really. Just different and some people can’t deal with or perform in one or the other.

And then Belt. Can we say, “This changes everything. Again.” right about now?

Because it does.

They aren’t winning.

And he just scored all of the Grizzlies five runs in a game.

Oh.

Steve Jobs, wanna help?

Jon Daniels did a live chat today, by the way, and someone named Chuck kept asking questions. I have an (irrational? Yes.) theory that it was Chuck Greenberg who is bitter about being pushed out of the organization and is stalking JD and Nolan. Is that unfair as well as irrational? Don’t tell me. I already know the answers.

I need to get to bed early tonight in preparation for my rockin’ party tomorrow in honor of my One Year Blogging Anniversary. Read: desserts and a long blog post. Nobody really wants to party with me about a geeky baseball blog.

Diamond Girl

p.s. Trivia time! Does anyone know the Giants Low A Ball affiliate? City and team name? I just found out today.

The Augusta GreenJackets (Augusta, Georgia, that is). Who knew?

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Pressure Points That Relieve Headaches For World Series Winning Teams To Play Better At Home

Freak Season2.PNG

I got my contest prize yesterday, which is this beautiful photo book, “Freak Season”.  It has some fascinating little moments and I definitely recommend it to people who are Tim Lincecum fans (though no one is as big as me.  I am the ultimate Tim Lincecum fan.)  Yesterday was a good day.  Today?  Not so much.

 

Reasons today was depressing:

 

·         The Giants were on Fox.

I try not to be one of those endless complainers about national media but the broadcasters today made me want to pluck my eyeballs out with forks.  Not literally.

 

·         The Giants lost.

Dismally.  In the fog.

 

·         Pat Burrell attempted to run.

I never thought I would feel badly for him, but today I ever so slightly did.  It was painful to watch him run.  And what is with his eyebrows?  If someone doesn’t want to do anything with their eyebrows, I won’t pick on them.  But his look done.  Just bizarrely.

 

·         Tim Lincecum attempted to pitch.

And failed.

 

·         Tim Hudson pitched.

And succeeded brilliantly.  I have a little Big 3 nostalgia for him, but not when he’s blowing my Giants away.  Without even huffing and puffing.  Profoundly effortless, on his part.

 

·         The offense attempted to hit.

And failed.

 

·         Neftali Feliz was placed on the disabled list.

With right shoulder inflammation.  The club said that it’s sort of precautionary, since he’s so young.  My fingers are solidly crossed that that is true.

 

·         MLB has a new ad featuring Brian Wilson’s beard that is seriously nauseating.  

May I just say that epic is not always a compliment?  As in, epic can be an adverb, paired with words such as, “ridiculous”, “hideous” and/or “plain stupid”.  On KNBR the other day, they had the topic “Who’s your favorite Giant?” and I was floored by the lack of Brian Wilson responses.  I thought I was the odd one out in being sick of the act.  I don’t  think so.  He needs some serious image consultation.

 

There was some comic relief, though.  Like the girl with the “Marry Me, Ryan Braun” sign.  I don’t feel like I’m on high enough ground to pick on her, but at least my sign was a non-committal statement and it sure didn’t have my phone number.  My ground is at least a few inches higher, right?

 

marry me ryan braun.PNG

And I guess it’s sort of good news that the Giants are going on a 10 game roadtrip after tomorrow, because they seem better on the road, though their record is just about even.  I mean, I would be too, if there were crazy people with smeared eye-black and orange chest paint yelling strange cheers at 100 decibels.  Which is why I want Meditation Day at the ballpark and I would be a bad baseball player because I would choke when delivering the “the fans were so loud, it was amazing” line.  Although maybe they mean amazing in a bad way…?  Because otherwise I don’t get it.  I wonder if they are given a handbook after they win the World Series about pressure points that relieve headaches.  That could be useful.  For the players and the fans, actually.  I’m going to try acupressure next time I’m there.

 

Diamond Girl

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