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Quiz: What Baseball Fragrance Are You?

After reading that the Yankees are going to be coming out with two original perfumes later this month, which are imaginatively titled, “New York Yankees” and “New York Yankees for Her”, I got to thinking about the whole baseball-related-perfumes thing.  I, personally, am a Brit by Burberry girl and the Italian lime, icy pear, green almond, white peony, sugared almonds (cousins to cinnamon roasted almonds- obviously why I bought it), amber, mahogany, vanilla and Tonka bean notes it contains make me feel glam and British all the time.  But I admit, I nearly bought Prada’s Amber because 1) I am a Lover of All Things Prada and b) it reminded me of olives and pizza and spaghetti.  Sometimes scents that bring up particularly vivid images, especially of food, are terribly attractive to a buyer.

So what about a scent that smells like All Things Baseball?  Whatever that means to you in particular.  We’re not all garlic fries people.  And anyone can tell you that the bleachers smell completely different than a second tier box.

So!  I now present to you a Diamond Girl original, “Create Your Own Baseball Fragrance”!  Just select a option for each question and keep track on your fingers or a spare piece of paper.  Prepare to be wowed at the end.  Now you’re ready to go.

1.  What is your favorite ballpark food?

a)  A hot dog and some fries are a classic and perfect choice.

b)  The catered sushi is the best!

c)  Can’t beat a Philly cheese steak, now can you?

d)   I whet my appetite with a soda, add a hot dog with a fun blend of condiments, one serving of fries and then top it off with a few sticks of cotton candy.

2.  What is your favorite place to sit in the stadium?

a)  As long as I can see a ballgame, anywhere is fine.

b)  The suite.  Duh.

c)  The heat of the bleachers is the best!

d)  Near the concessions stands, of course.

3.  Who is your favorite player in the Major Leagues?

a)  Buster Posy of course!  I saw him in Single A Fresno and have been following him ever since.

b)  No one is classier than A-Rod himself.

c)  If he can trash-talk, I dig him.

d)  The Kung Fu Panda is loveable and a blast to watch.

4.  What is your favorite between-innings scoreboard feature?

a)  The updates about the Minor Leagues are always interesting.

b)  When the camera shows moi and the light catches my new highlights.

c)  When the camera shows me and my buddies in our chest-paint!

d)  The features about the stadium food are a lot of fun and totally make me hungry

5.  What is your favorite color?

a)  The green of freshly mowed grass.

b)  Black and white.  Very Chanel.

c)  Team colors, yo!

d)  If it looks edible, it’s good.

If you got mostly A’s, your scent is… Simply Green, by Buster Posey.  Presented by a quintessential good American ballplayer, this scent is for the fans who dig baseball games of all levels, everything from Little League to the sparkly Major Leagues.  The scent combines the fresh smell of grass with notes of that distinctive freshly ironed clothes smell.  This retro perfume will you take you back to the joys of small-town America.

If you got mostly B’s, your scent is… Bâşèbãll, by Alex Rodriguez.  You ooze sophistication and love all things chic and tailored about the game of baseball.  This scent smells like clear summer days, water and the citrus notes of icy lemonade.  Perfectly suited for everything from your suite at the ballgame to a gathering later in the evening, this perfume is endorsed by one of baseball’s best socialites.

If you got mostly C’s, your scent is… Move, by Jonathan Papelbon.  Made for the people who have an equal love of both playing and watching baseball, this scent captures the essence of the heat  and movement of sports, with a unique blend of sweat and tension that will amp you up for a hot day, whether you’re on the field or in your seat.

If you got mostly D’s, your scent is… Crimson and Gold, by Pablo Sandoval.  The Kung Fu Panda is rather partial to ketchup and mustard, so he’s the perfect guy to endorse this ballpark-food-themed scent aimed at the bleacher-sitting, seed-chewing fan.  Featuring yummy whiffs of hot dogs, garlic fries and cotton candy, this is sure to leave your friends hungry for more.

If you got a mix of all of them… Congratulations, you may be a well-adjusted and semi-normal human being!  Proceed to the mall and buy a real perfume.  xoxo.

Diamond Girl

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Nothing All That Groundbreaking

So much to talk about, so much to talk about! 

The past few days have been busy ones on the baseball scene and particularly for us Giants fans.  News!  At last!  This is all rather exciting, so let’s get into it, shall we?

First, let’s talk Media Day, which was Friday.  We found out some important things like that Timmy might cut his hair, Pablo might have gained or lost weight or something but everybody’s glasses are broken and nobody’s really clear and Bruce Bochy has taken back #15, now that Beltran is safely parked anywhere but here in San Francisco.  (Otherwise known as St. Louis.  Yeah.)   Conspiracy theories abounded, which prompted me to remind people with wagging tongues that Bochy doesn’t control free agent signings and I highly doubt Brian Sabean cares what number Boch wears, but that ruins all the fun of theorizing, so then I just shut up about it and all the intricacies of front offices.  As I said, important stuff.  Angel Pagan is the new heartthrob of the moment it seems and Buster Posey is completely lovable as usual.

Forget what I said, actually.  Nothing all that groundbreaking at all.

Today, of course, was Fan Fest.  ::shivers::  I was tossing around the idea of going, after the fabulous Town Hall stream last night- more on that in a moment- but then I woke up and had French toast and enjoyed lying in bed far too much and really, why would I drag myself out to be trampled by masses of well-meaning but slightly crazed Giants fans?

If you answered, “you wouldn’t,” then you are absolutely right.  I stayed home.

Speaking of that Town Hall!  It was a really good time, actually.  More concise than usual (says Miss We Need More Extensive Interviews) and they really kept everything moving, which was good.  Kruk and Kuip were in fantastic, awkward form and ugly hoodies and badly fitting jeans abounded on the players.  Pretty much what you’d expect from that sort of event.  But seeing as it’s been months and months since a real, live, actual Major League Baseball games, I was inclined to absolutely adore every moment of it.  And live tweet it, of course.  Sorry, Twitter followers.  I know the revelations on Dan Runzler’s hair may or may not have entertained you.

I also loved the open season on Affeldt.  He takes it like a champ (World Series 2010 champ, yo) and has solidified his position as my Favorite Giant, which changes extremely often but who knows, he might hold it for a while.  His performance last night earned him it, for sure.

Huggles, y’all.  The season is getting close.  I can smell it.  It doesn’t smell like cinnamon and cranberries and pumpkin like the playoffs, unfortunately, but it does smell like fresh flowers and sunshine.  Which is good.  Very, very good.

Diamond Girl

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Revealing the Real Reason Behind Sabean’s Splurges

I am now going to say something I don’t think I’ve been able to say all offseason.  So this is, like, history.  Ready?  Okay.  Here ‘tis:

There is lots to talk about!

I know, completely gasp-worthy.

But with the arbitration deadline looming, Spring Training sneaking closer and today being Official Obsess About Yu Darvish Day (that is, Darvish Signing Deadline Day) it’s actually true.

It would also probably explain why I am in a very smiley mood right this second.  People have actually quit talking about some madness they call “49ers” and are discussing our darling Giants.

Among a lot of people I have never heard of, some guy named Pablo Sandoval settled a three year extension with SF coming out to three years for $17.15 million as well as Nate Schierholtz and $1.3 million, Santiago Casilla at $2.2 million and Melky Cabrera at $6 million.

There was a study a while back that I am having no luck finding (probably because, yes, half the internet is blacked out and pretending to be censored) about how people spend more in the first few months of the year because they’re depressed by the cold weather and therefore reaching for their wallets for some impulse buys.

Let me tell you, we are having some seriously depressing weather in the Bay Area right now.  Blue Monday was two days ago.  It’s no wonder Sabes wants to do some retail therapy.

While he’s at it?  He should, for pity’s sake, give Timmy what he wants.

Okay, fine.  Just kidding.  (Not about Timmy, about the other stuff.)  I know he needed to sign these people.  And aside from Casilla who I am no way shape or form sold on, I’m pretty good with all of the deals.  There is, of course, the fact that the 2012 squad is liable to look a good deal like the 2011 squad, Andres Torres look-alike and possible act-alike (that is, Angel Pagan) in CF and all but it… could be worse than 2011, I suppose.

On the bright side, maybe the Diamondbacks will be terrible!

(Yes, I am being depressing.  I know.  Blame the weather, yo.)

As for Darvish, Jon Daniels announced that the Rangers and Yu have made a deal for six years, worth $60 million, and although JD basically looked like death warmed over (blame the late night negotiations, not the weather for that one) I was seriously stoked.  For one, that’s a lot of boxes of pasta/BMWs Darvish can buy, right there.  And also, I mean, there’s the little fact that the Rangers have a fabulous new pitcher for their rotation.  Which is kind of good news.  To brighten up the depressingness.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  In case you were left at the edge of your seat from my last post, I will put you out of your misery now and inform you that I am indeed boycotting the Golden Globes for the next hundred years.  Definitely.  Probably.  Maybe.  We’ll see, actually.  No matter what, Howard Shore is still God and still should have won.

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Warning: The Post Contains Moving Images. A Whole Lot of Them.

Sometimes, when I am especially sleepy, I get tempted to turn this blog into a GIF bonanza.  Baseball-themed GIF bonanza, that is.  Hey, it could totally work!

For instance:

The Winter Meetings start tomorrow!

I am sleepy.

Me to Pablo Sandoval:

In this one I am Princess Leia and the Giants are Han Solo.

What I want to say when Brian Sabean is all, “We’re still interested in Carlos Beltran!”  (In Lord of the Rings lingo this is:  Sit down, Legolas.  In Jon Daniels lingo this is:  siddown already!)

This is has been a great offseason for the Giants!

And they are perfect with Brandon Crawford starting at shortstop next year.

Ryan Braun, you want to come to San Fran, right?  And San Fran, you want Ryan and his million year contract, right?

Do your eyes hurt yet?  Yes?  Okay, maybe the GIF bonanza wasn’t that good an idea after all.  I will need to meditate on this.  But first, I need a pig here.  Definitely.

Diamond Girl

p.s.   My meditation today has been more like, “WINTERMEETINGSWINTERMEETINGSWINTERMEETINGS” actually.  Because I am stoked, baby.  Beyond stoked.

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My Favorite Game of the Year? You May Be Surprised.

I figure now that the season is over I should probably make some attempt to be a cultured person, so I went to a museum exhibit this afternoon.  And while paintings of frozen Dutch rivers are absolutely lovely, I spent a good part of the exhibit replaying the season in my head and trying to choose my favorite game.

It feels like an impossible thing to do, because along the way, games are wonderful for a huge number of reasons.  Sometimes it’s simply that it’s an important one or that it’s one that I got to go to or one where the Giants just did really well.  But one did keep standing out in my mind and saying, Pick me!  Pick me!  (Yes, baseball games do talk in my head.  Not weird at all, right?)

So I’ve picked that one.  It probably wasn’t that important and dramatic in the scheme of things, but it’s one that I’ll never forget all the same.  Let’s flashback to it, July 2nd, 2011 at Tigers Stadium.

It’s Giants vs. Tigers, Zito (2-1) vs. Max Scherzer (9-4).  Detroit is 1.5 games out of first place and San Francisco is in first place, 3 round games ahead of Arizona.  Yesterday, they beat the Tigers in heart attack fashion for the first game of the series by a final of 4-3, with Wilson throwing a world class tantrum after blowing the save.

So it began.  The Giants scored five runs in the first inning on B-Craw and Panda homers and things moved along nicely from there, blowout style.  But Michigan weather had other plans.  A massive thunderstorm hit in the third, suddenly and with a stunning amount of rain.  We all worried that game would not restart and all those runs would go to waste, but then the sky turned orange and I, for one, knew that boded well.

After nearly three hours, once all the fans had presumably gone home and gotten toasty with hot chocolate or whatever, the umps announced the game was back on.  We all raised our eyebrows and un-muted our televisions.

And then the fun started.

The first pitch following the rain delay was hit grandly into the stands by Miguel Tejada for a grand freakin’ slam.

Zito stayed in his zone by listening to lame rappers (hey, whatever works) and came back to pitch after all that time and gave the team six scoreless innings, over 80 pitches.

The runs party did not stop there and the game eventually ended at 12:36 local time with a final score of 15-3, Giants winning.  It was one of those crazy games that just reaffirms your adoration of baseball and that the game will do what it will do.  And, you know, I live for rain.  So if my team can pull off 15 runs in the rain, that makes me love them a little more.  If that’s even possible.

Diamond Girl

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