Tag Archives: michael schlact

5 Reasons A Team Needs to Sign Michael $chlact, Even Minus Dollar Sign

When it comes to Rangers vs. Giants, my loyalties are a little complicated.  This, you know about me.

I am not exactly looking forward to today’s game.  Who do I root for?  Then again, my two teams in one place?  My ears and eyes on one game?  That’s magic.

Now seems like a fitting time to make a player pitch (no pun intended.  Seriously.)  I don’t think any General Managers read this blog but hey, you never know.  And if any do stumble across it, it can’t hurt to give them a little wake-up call about the missing link on their team.  Two words:

Michael Schlact.

Why you (the GM’s) might ask?

5 Reasons You Should Sign Him:

5.  Picture him standing next to me.  Just picture it.  That’s 6″7 versus 5″1.

4.  He’d provide your team with a giant positive PR hurricane.  He runs Inspirational Quotes/Friendly Ball Player Reponses 101 over on Twitter.

3.  He’s also the funniest guy since the creation of micro-blogging.  “You know why KE$HA is cool? Cause she has a dollar sign in her name. That’s what I need. Michael $chlact.”

2.  It is so 2000′s to judge a pitcher on his shoulder/elbow surgery.  It’s hip and cool and 2011 to realize plenty of them come back from that.  (Being hip and cool is obviously a convincing factor for General Managers.)

1.  He is 110% committed to any team who will give him a chance.  Even if you don’t know it yet, you need him around.  And while you’re at it, follow him on Twitter at @Michael_Schlact.

By the way… I just realized that Opening Day is this month.  Wow.   Wow referring to the fact that it is and that I just noticed it.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  There are so many things that crack me up about CJ Wilson’s blog header.  Particularly the “2008, a whole new year” and the “how to pitch to Guerrero thing”.  I guess he does need to pitch to Guerrero now.  But he didn’t last year.  I am a teen and all, but baseball moves too fast for my brain.

CJ Wilson blog header.PNG

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