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The Perks of Being a Loser, Including Our Resident Smart Ballplayer Who Actually Reads Political Memoirs

For the record, I am not really calling the Giants losers after one game like that.  I am just so in love with the title of Emma Watson’s newest project, “The Perks of Being a Wallflower” that I had to use it.

Don’t get me wrong.  I hate when the Giants lose and have no offense.  But it does have perks!  It all puts me into neurotic girl-fan mode and I, well, bake.  A lot.  The product of today’s loss?  The awesomest pecan rolls ever.  If I do say so myself.  My family does not mind the loss at all.  Except for The Brother, who does not like pecan rolls (how can you not like pecan rolls?  No idea.) and asks me ever so earnestly to please make chocolate cake next time.  I said yes.  So he’s probably rooting for another loss soon.

These are the pecan rolls in their beautiful uncooked state.

Am I trying to get all our minds off that game?  Yes, I am.  But it has to be discussed some time and there’s no time like the present.  Let’s do this!

Timmy faced Clayton by some loveliness of the schedule that pitted the aces against each other.  It was a great pitching game, with the Dodgers getting 3 hits and 1 run and the Giants getting 3 hits and, ahem, no runs.  Which tallies- if you’re not real good with math- for a 1-0 final score, LA winning.

As depressing as the train of 0’fers is, it really was a stellar pitcher they were facing and San Francisco took two out of three from the series.  I won’t repeat the stale saying that if you win but don’t sweep every series in the season you’d have a pretty great final win-loss record, but… if you win but don’t sweep every series in the season you’d have a pretty great final win-loss record.  It’s true.

And Chris Stewart got two hits, which makes me irrationally smiley.  He is our resident Smart Ballplayer here, who spends his copious amounts of downtime reading historical fiction and political memoirs and “whatever piques his interest”.  I wasn’t aware that anyone actually reads that stuff – remember when they call political memoirs “the black hole of publishing” in The Ghost?  So I was impressed with him.  And then that arm.  That arm.  I am in love with that arm.  I also saw him in Fresno in April and I’ve kind of had an affinity for him ever since.  He also has stated that his favorite football teams are the Dallas Cowboys.  Think that means he likes the Rangers too, but is afraid to say it?  I will have to explore this further.  So his hits were definitely a perk.  As much I like Eli, I am kind of hoping Chris wins the backup job when Buster comes back.  Just thinking about the distant future here.

So, see?  There are perks to losing a game here and there.  The Brewers are coming to town on Friday which I am alternately very excited/not excited at all about.  Ryan seems to be alive and kicking and healthy(ish), which is, of course, News That Makes Me Totally Stoked.

Now if only Pablo heal up nice and fast and Jeff Keppinger (I so needed Google to get the name right) would display some wonderful skills with the bat, my nerves would calm down not to mention we’d have way fewer dishes to do to, following my baking sprees.

Sorry, I refuse to say Happy Hump Day.  But Happy Wednesday!

Diamond Girl

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Retraction. Things You Shouldn’t Know About the Twins

They hit.  A lot.  On occasion.  Occasions like last night.  That is something we all wish we didn’t know about the Twins.  Fear not!  I’m going to make you feel a lot better.  Therapy Emily is here.

But first, wipe that horrified look off your face.

Yes, Madison Bumgarner made history as the first pitcher since 1900 to let in eight runs, while only recording one out.  Yes, the Giants, while they got nine hits, only managed two runs.  Yes, it was a basically horrifying night.

But at the same time, it’s an easier loss to take for me as a fan.  Because it was a no-doubter, you know?   Madison was absolutely, utterly terribly.  That’s it.  That’s what went wrong. 

Likelihood is?  He’ll be just fine in the future.  And even if this were to be a signal of things to come for him in the future, I don’t know why people are calling for him to be traded right now.  This is the worst possible moment to trade him.  His stock is at its lowest.  Wait for him to squeeze out some quality starts and then trade him, if you must.  Additionally, I disagree with people saying he should be sent down or skip a start.  His morale is probably also at its lowest.  Unless there’s an underlying, bigger physical or mechanical issue that they know of, I think they should let him take the mound in five days.  And see how it plays out.  Show a little confidence in him.

Zito, of course, took last night to throw a two hit, complete game shutout for Fresno, making a nice little bid for a spot in the wacky rotation.  But Bochy denies anything happening with Bumgarner and says he’s meeting with Barry today, which sounds foreboding, but maybe I’m just paranoid.  We’ll see.

A little brightsideness?  Today is Ryan Vogelsong and I actually think he could be a stopper.  Never thought I’d write those words.  But baseball is a strange game.

Try saying that to Madison Bumgarner.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  Dodger Stadium today?  Oh. My. God.  That is so empty it’s not even funny.  And believe me, I find just about everything about the Dodgers funny.

Photo via @dylanohernandez

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April 1st in Diamond Girl World and The Need For Some Brandon Belt Clones

I’m not going to try and prank you.  It’s too late in the day, for that.  Everyone is on guard by now.  That doesn’t mean I haven’t pranked anyone today.  Read on.

My morning routine is basically to stumble out of my bed (TMI?  Yes.), read my news on my iPod and then tell anyone who is awake and will listen what’s going on in baseball.  So this morning this is how it went:

Diamond Girl:  Oh my god, did you hear?  They traded Timmy.

The Brother is not buying it at all.

The Sister:  What?

DG (sounding panicked):  They traded Lincecum!

The Sister:  They can’t.  He’s the Franchise.

At this point The Mother comes running out of the kitchen. 

 Mother:  WHAT?

DG (on the verge of tears):  He and Sabean got in this huge fight last night and the Cards have been bugging the Giants about a starting pitcher, because they lose Wainwright, so last night Sabean was like, Take Timmy. 

The Mother and The Sister run to their respective computers to read the news.

DG (yells after them):  April Fool!

What happens after this needs not be related.  Let’s just say all hell broke loose.  They’re both big Timmy people.

It worked perfectly.  Last year, it was the whole “we’re moving to New Jersey!” thing on Facebook.  That one went way too far.  And then two perfectly executed prank calls.  It’s quality, not quantity.

And about tonight’s game?  I didn’t get to listen to most of it, but I hear it got ugly.  We can still go 160-2, right?  Or clone Brandon Belt because he is way beyond great and I love him?  Or just get a good, morale boosting defense coach?  That’s a kind of good idea, actually.  I have a few candidates for that job.  Like, you know, me.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  Don’t be paranoid, Giants fans. She takes the midnight train at Dodger stadium every night.  They’re not playing Don’t Stop Believin’ to mock us.

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May I Just Say That Cries Of “Fire Sabean”, “Get Some Darn Offense” and “The Giants Can’t Repeat” Are Totally Unwarranted?

So the day got off to a rocky start for me with the headline:

Giants lefty Zito taken to hospital after car accident.

The actual news stories added the unimportant fact that he was also released from the hospital.  He’s okay.  Neck brace and precautionary MRI, but he’s okay.  It took me a few hours of Enya and Owl City to calm down.  These things strike at the weirdest times, don’t they?  I hope he’s good to start on Sunday.

The fact that Real Live Baseball That Counts happened today lightened the mood, although the last 45 minutes before the Giants game were torture.  I’ve lasted months and months without baseball, but somehow the home stretch felt very long.

The other thing that was torture?  Yeah.  The game.  There were good things about it and there were bad things.  As an eternal positivist (sort of), I’m going to start with the good stuff.

Brandon Belt looked good.  He looked confident and ready to go and totally above the hype.  Half of me is 110% sold on him, even though half of my brain says it’s too early for that.  Overall, I think we’ll be seeing him at first base for a long time to come.

Tim Lincecum.  I was worried he was going to melt.  His hair looked really long (was that just me) and he looks borderline vampirical in heat.  And though he didn’t look totally tip-top, he wasn’t worrisome to me.

Buster was, a little bit.  He felt out of it.  He was one for four and, of course, had that play with Sandoval at third.  He might just have been tired or something.  The whole defense looked like it did at the exhibition games, which is not surprising since it’s only two days later.  But it’s ever so slightly more troublesome on Opening Day.

And do y’all think Timmy hit Uribe on purpose?  I am of the opinion that it was a “hello there, remember me?” pitch.  But I’m curious to hear the buzz ’round here.

So now I’m going to listen to more Enya and Owl City and remind myself that it’s the first game and it really doesn’t matter.  1 down, 161 to go.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  And as I said in the title: “fire Sabean”, “get some darn offense” and “the Giants can’t repeat” are totally unwarranted.

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‘Cause it’s February, the 22nd and I’m hugging Dodgers…

…and I can’t tell a lie.

I have watched Holiday Inn way (and I mean way, way) too many times so as soon as I looked at a calendar and saw it was February the 22nd that song got stuck in my head. 

The Giants Spring Training season kicks off on Friday and I’m not gonna lie:  I am counting the minutes.  Well, days.  But almost minutes.  I am, once again, not gonna lie:  I would prefer to be in the Grapefruit League.  The Grapefruit League brings to mind a sort of comic book world with eternal spring and around the clock baseball.  The Cactus League just brings rather unpleasant memories of cactus that grows a little too far onto the sidewalk.  The rest is unfortunate history.

I would also like to say that my heart breaks a little every time I see something about Juan Uribe in Dodger Blue.   The Merc was kind enough to make an entire photo slideshow of said object.  That was sort of rough.  One picture is, you know, plenty.

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Uribe is an example of someone who totally has a personality without freaky beards or black masks or anything like that.  Oooo-ribe was wonderful while it lasted.  He will be missed.

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I’ve almost filled up my Talking About Dodgers quota so I’ll go fast with this… don’t you dare make a joke about Eugenio Velez missing his flight and missing that ball.  You know the one.  I was there and it was wet.  And he had just gotten hit in the head, which tends to be omitted from the history books.  Velez is a good defensive outfielder and he tries 110% all the time.  Which is, of course, part of his problem but you can’t say he doesn’t try.  And that play is utterly understandable and missing a plane flight is no fun at all.  Hugs to him too.

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I need to sign off before I hug any more Dodgers.  Happy February the 22nd.  Treat yourself to a little Fred Astaire.  And a little more.

Diamond Girl

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