Tag Archives: josh hamilton

A Dystopia, Featuring Churros, Bud Selig and Joe Torre!

I suffered through seeing a 2-0 lead vaporized in one swing of a Tiger bat in the third inning, only to miss the grand payoff in the 11th, on a wild goose chase that may or may not have been centered around my hair.  (Fine.  It was.  I admit it.)

Oh, did I mention that grand payoff?

It was grand in the sense that it was awesome, but also in the sense that it was a grand-freaking-slam from Nelson Cruz.  Walk-off.  In the 11th.  First walk-off grand slam in the playoffs in the history of Major League Baseball.  I’ve watched it over more times than I care to mention and it gives me goosebumps every time.  Seriously, haven’t these playoffs just been the most dramatic anyone could ever possibly have hoped for?  I can just imagine Joe Torre sitting in the stands, looking satisfied and evil.

Speaking of Torre!  I’m a little torn.  I think he looks less scary in a suit than in a uniform, but there’s also something vaguely menacing about the idea of him working of the league.  Um, dystopia waiting to happen, anyone?

I’m sure I’m being unfair to him and he’s a totally teddy bear, in reality, but… I can’t quite get rid of that image of him (in a Dodgers uniform, of course) being Selig’s silent, right-hand man as Bud takes over the US and makes candy illegal and makes everyone he doesn’t like sell churros or something.  Really, am I alone on this?

And if I am alone and you are staring at your computer screen in disbelief right now because of that rant, then blame FOX who interviewed him more times then they needed to, during the rain delay the other night and put all this jazz in my head.

Lastly, I would just like to say that I am very stoked for the Rangers and all, but they are most certainly testing my fandom by sporting those ridiculous beards.  Josh Hamilton looks like someone splashed tomato sauce on his face and Mike Napoli looks like he always shaves a little-too-high-onto-the-neck-which-turns-into-chin.  So, yeah, I have a little present for them.

Thank the stars Alexi is clean-shaven and I can still love him to death.  Okay, ‘nuff whining for the day.  Antlers and rain and cinnamon sticks in coffee to all!

Diamond Girl

p.s.  Why do the Canadians get Thanksgiving before us?  Why?

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99 Bottles of Ginger Ale on the Clubhouse Wall

Yes, it’s in honor of the Rangers clinching a spot in the ALCS.  Yes, I’ll be embarrassed if I hear that they didn’t actually do the ginger ale thing this year.  Yes, that’s actually 99 and I counted.  And no, Canada Dry did not sponsor this post.

Cheers, y’all!

Diamond Girl

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Why I Think AJ Preller is in Mongolia and Baby Giraffe Refers to a Viral Video of a Yawning Giraffe

I decided it was time to escape from the torture and I was missing my Texans terribly, so I snuck off to the O.Co Coliseum this morning and spent the day there.

It all started off very well, blow-out style, with the A’s walking in a run in the first and I was perfectly prepared to sit back and eat french fries that, yes, tasted a bit like gasoline. Then things got a li’l tense. Make that very tense. Eventually, the Rangers untied it in top of the 9th and after an iffy bottom, I went home with a heart rate slightly elevated and a 7-6 victory. They won and the Angels lost, which is the bottom line, but couldn’t they have just done it 10-0 or something, for this long-suffering San Fran’er?

I do have to the give the Rangers credit, though. They were the sweetest away team I’ve ever seen and I got an autograph from the former Best Hair in the MLB King, CJ Wilson (he might get that crown back, because now I’ve seen the hair up close) and their adorable pitching coach, Mike Maddux, the owner of a rather impressive mustache. Josh Hamilton also gave a bat away to a kid (the word is that he does that at every game) and signed for nearly 20 minutes, which is not exactly easy with the A’s dugouts. He was totally personable and nice to everyone. Love that guy.

The Maddux ‘Stache

I was secretly sneaking glances around, trying to spot AJ Preller (Rangers Senior Director, Player Personnel and former frat brother of Jon Daniels) but I figure he was probably on the Mongolian planes or something scouting around for awesome talent, not hanging in Oakland so I didn’t spot him. Better luck next time, when the appeal of throat singing has worn off, maybe.

Anyhow, I got home and saw a lot of things about a “Baby Giraffe”. At first I thought it was a viral video of a baby giraffe yawning or something (not irrational of me, there are loads) and then I realized that it actually had to do with one Brandon Belt. He, eh, hit two home runs. I don’t need to explain what that all means. Belt has been mismanaged this year no question, I think, but what’s done is done. I want to see way more out of him like that. The Giants are still very much in contention and if Brandon can help out with that, fabulous. I, for one, or maybe one million, am very glad he’s here. And glad to have a taken a series. (Taken a series! How foreign and fantastic that feels to type.)

And I finally got to test out a line I’ve waited a long time for. When the A’s mascot walked by, I was all, “Can somebody get this walking carpet out of my way?” Just, you know, channeling my inner Princess Leia.

Diamond Girl

p.s. When Alexi Ogando walked by, I nearly fainted. And when Mike Adams walked by? My mind screamed, “Giant killer!”. But my face just smiled politely, in case you were wondering.

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500 Facts to Brighten Your Blue Monday

No, you misread the title.  It said 5 facts to brighten your Blue Monday.

Not that my Monday needs any brightening.  But I just read that today is something called Blue Monday- a day called by “scientists” the most depressing day of the year.  Reading that was the most depressing thing that’s happened to me all day, honestly, but I figure some of you might need brightening.  So.  5 Facts to Brighten Your Blue Monday.

5.  Josh Hamilton left the hospital today, after being there for five days with pneumonia.  Wishing him a smooth rest-of-recovery.

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4.   Albert Pujols will not leave the Cardinals.  If we repeat that enough times, it will totally come true.  Join hands.  Positive affirmations only.

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3.  Moneyball comes out in 249 days.  I am still not sold on the whole Brad Pitt thing but I am, evidently, counting the days ’til it comes out.

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2.  And since we’re doing the whole countdown thing here, it’s 73 days until the Ultimate Day, a.k.a. Opening Day.  And I’ll let you in on a little secret.  I just realized the home opener is on a special day for me.  No, I’m not getting married or moving to the set of Lord of the Rings.  Nothing like that.  It’s a, you know, recurring special day.  I will reveal more to my obviously riveted audience later.

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1.  The Giants won the World Series.  Say it out loud, for good measure.  I know it’s become sort of common knowledge now, but it does serve to remember it.

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And here’s to a less depressing tomorrow.  ::clinks orange juice glasses::

Diamond Girl

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30 Reasons I, Usually a Giants Fan, am Rooting for the Rangers in the World Series

I am confirming the rumors circulated by TMZ for the past few days.  I am indeed rooting for the Rangers in the World Series.  Normally, they’re my AL team and the Giants are my NL team and there’s not a problem, but since they are now matched up, I’ve had to choose.  And while I have loyalties with both, I’ve realized I am really rooting for the Rangers.  Because my orange and black co-conspirators may have a hard time understanding why, I’ve come up with 30 reasons. 

 

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30.  Elvis Andrus has a hair related superstition going, but his hair still looks good.

29.  “It’s Time” is easier and quicker to say than “It’s Magic Inside”.

28.  In contrast to Halloween colors, no one will think I’m celebrating a holiday if I wear blue and red.

27.  I like saying y’all.

:: Diamond Girl thinks, Did I really commit to writing 30 of these?  Is it too late to go and edit the title to 20 or better yet, 15?::

26.  CJ Wilson is the best dressed MLB player and he has the best hair in MLB to boot.

25.  Ron Washington gets so into it and he gives good postgame interviews.

24.  Fans of other teams who are taking sides are all siding with the Giants and you know me, I dig the underdog.

23.  Bengie is in Arlington.  I love Bengie, duh, I love the Rangers.

24.  And okay, yes, J.D. has something to do with it too.

23.  Their closer does not have hideous facial hair.

22.  And for that matter, neither does their bullpen.

21.  And Ian Kinsler has a nice haircut.

20.  But my choices are not as influenced by hair as I may be leading you to believe.

19.  Because I love Nolan Ryan too.  And he has hardly any hair at all.  So there.  ::Diamond Girl nods proudly to herself.::

18.  I hate the term “good backstory” being used about baseball players, but if anyone has one, Josh Hamilton does.  And it ain’t rodeo clown related.

17.  And yes, I have moments where I feel like a traitor.  And yes, it has something to do with the betrayed look my family has taken to giving me.  (Kidding.  They are all very sweet about it.  And my father and sister are rooting for the Rangers too.)

16.  And okay, yes, J.D. has something to do with it too.

15.  The name, as I have stated in previous posts, makes me think of Aragorn and by extension, Lord of the Rings.  I will never root against anyone or anything that makes me think of Aragorn and by extension, Lord of the Rings.

14.  Neftali Feliz is a beautiful name.  I like names that are fun to say and pretty to write.  But that does not make me an un-serious fan.

13.  Everything is a first in Arlington right now.  How awesome and incredible is that to watch?  It’s not like they’re facing the Yankees (yes, I know that’s impossible since they’re both in the AL, I’m just using the example) but the Giants were in a World Series just eight years ago.  Seems like nothing compared to what them Texans have gone through.

12.  They’re a gorgeously strong team.  Coming out of the weak AL West, where they would have only needed to be a few games over .500 to make the playoffs, they beat the Rays and the Yanks which is no small feat.

11.  It can never be said too many times:  the antlers rule.

10.  And so does the claw.  New easiest way to make a San Franciscan angry is to give them the claw.

9.  And okay, yes, J.D. has something to do with it too.

8.  The giant smiles on Josh Hamilton’s face when the team is doing well should be enough to convert anyone.

7.  And who can root against Vladdy?  (Answer:  No one.)

6.  Because they sprayed ginger ale on Hamilton and CJ.  I love that.  I adore that.  That joins the list of Things that Rule.

5.  The Rangers are in the spotlight.  Can’t ignore something like that, now can we?

4.  Boy gets drafted.  Nobody likes boy.  Boy goes to Japanese league.  Everyone likes boy.  Boy goes to Texas Rangers and pitches incredibly.  Boy goes to World Series.  Boy is named Colby Lewis. 

3.  Formerly bankrupt people always come out on top.  Kind of.  Sort of.  Well, in this case.  They have almost come out on top.

2.  And okay, yes, J.D. has something to do with it too.

1.  ‘Cause It’s Time.  And y’all can’t argue with that.

 

 

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Who is now a Ranger fan?

Diamond Girl

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