Tag Archives: cubs

Let’s Talk About What Mystery Grab Bags Generally Entail

Those of you who know me know that my favorite days of the year are as follows:

10.  The day the coffee is brewed when I wake up.

9.  Whatever arbitrary day it is that wearing all winter clothing and lots of scarves and snowkflake earrings becomes socially acceptable.

8.  The start of the various fashion weeks.  Especially Paris, before Dior went and hired a furniture designer as their head.  Still bitter.

7.  Opening Day is pretty rad.

6.  The day I get around to cleaning my mirror and realize my skin is not that bad.

5.  The day of the silly but still awesome Oscars.

4.  The day someone says something ridiculous and perfect at the Winter Meetings.

3.  The day Starbucks brings out their seasonal drinks.

2.  The day the bakery near my house starts making pumpkin rolls.

1.  All of these days are awesome.  But none of them match my unadulterated joy on that the Giants release their promotions and giveaways schedule for the coming season.  This day is better than the day pumpkineggnogpeppermint creations hit a café near you, so it’s pretty damn good.

Some gems this year are the fedora promotion from a couple years ago on steroids: a plaid fedora.  Plaid fedora.  Yes, I mean a plaid fedora.

Moving right along, they’re giving away magnet schedules which I don’t remember them doing recently, but I do know the Grizzlies did in 2010.  I used the magnet as a coaster and it was seriously the greatest giveaway on earth.  Oddly but definitely useful.  I only replaced it a few weeks ago with this wood-carving one which is nice, but not nearly as good at telling me who the Grizzlies are playing on May 15th, 2010.

There are the World Champions Umbrella and the World Series Parade Snow Globe, both of with kind of intrigue me, but neither of which are nearly as great as them Cubbies giving away lip balm last season.  (It was probably Theo’s idea.)

Lastly, of course, there’s the very first giveaway: the mystery grab bag.  I don’t really know what mystery grab bags generally entail, but if these ones don’t include a golden calf temporary tattoo à la Barry Zito, I’m throwing in the towel and becoming a Pirates fan.

Diamond Girl

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(Yet) Another Open Letter to Bud Selig

Back when I had copious amounts of hair, of course.

Dear Bud Selig,

First of all, I would like to note that our conversations have been feeling a little one-sided lately.  That’s a nice way of saying, Why the heck have you stopped answering my letters?  I put them on lilac-scented paper and everything.  Still, no answers.  I don’t mind you knowing that I feel like you’re blocking me out and that’s pretty hurtful.  Just answer me, okay?  If you’ve forgotten how to mail letters like everyone else in the 21st century, just get your assistant to do it or whatever.

To the point:  I’ve always been annoyed by the process of releasing the next season’s schedule at this time of year.  Kind of random.  Kind of right in the middle of the pennant race.  Or the wild card race.  Or the second wildcard race.  Pennant race is such a passé phrase these days.

But even if you’re going to release them now, why make them so controversial?  Now you may not understand why I find this controversial, but then again, you adore Interleague Play and as you know, I don’t.  So yes, I do find it controversial.  Bordering on offensive.

I used to be able to bear all the Interleague Play kookiness because it ended swiftly, before any of the real stuff kicked off after the All Star Break.  No longer.  Wikipedia and probably you too rationalized it with some mathematical stuff about the Astros moving to the American League necessitating Interleague Play being everywhere all the time, but I don’t really buy it.  “This will force interleague play throughout the season,” it says.  Really?  Force?

I mean, if you must, make the whole first half of the season Interleague, but then stop it there.  Seriously.  And if you’re going to mess with nature – I mean, scheduling – then why not make an effort to make the final month of the season mostly games playing within the division.  Because that’s pretty exciting.  More exciting than the Cubbies and the Mariners facing off in the Saddest Event Since Eli Whiteside Face the Guy With the 10.30 ERA.

(Sure, the Cubbies are going to win the World Series in the next four years.  But probably not next year.  Even Theo Epstein’s magic has some limitations.)

Well, I’ve spouted off long enough.  We actually have some important, non-Interleague games to play, and the Rockies were eliminated from division title contention last night, which just solidified my standing invitation to Dan O’Dowd for tea at my place.  He still hasn’t taken me up on it yet, but maybe when the sting of the elimination wears off…?

Anyhow, get back to me ASAP.  Thanks.

xoxo,

Diamond Girl

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Jed Hoyer Went Home to the West Coast

Chicago treated us awfully well.  (And San Diego scored 10 runs today, so although they lost, the Jed-Hoyer-ditching-the-Cubbies-for-a-West-Coast-vacay theory still seems increasingly likely.)   He was probably all, “I miss you, I’m going back home to the West Coast!” and the Padres were all, “Yay!  Come!  We’ll make you cupcakes!”

I’m a good hipster.  That was the first thing I thought of when I wrote that.

So he did (go back home to the West Coast, that is).  He also snuck some magic potion in Xavier Nady and quite probably Matt Cain, too.  In case you’re wondering, that’s not a doping reference.  It was a reference to the greatest series of comic books that have ever been created, Asterix and Obelix.  They’re French comics, but they’ve almost all been translated into English and if you haven’t read them, you seriously need to go do it now.

Alternately, read all the statistics about the records the Giants and Dodgers would have to have to end in a tie for first place.  It’s a little mindblowing.  In a good way.  A very, very good way.  Additionally, the A’s have the same record as the Yankees now and Bud Selig is more in love with the second wildcard than ever.  Needless to say, he and I are going to have a little talk.

But I admit it: this second wildcard is a lot of fun, even if it’s kind of morally abhorrent or whatever.

Anyway, have a lovely Labor Day, peoples!  The Diamondbacks will be in town tomorrow and over in Oakland, Billy Beane is in a fabulous mood.  (But he still looks nothing like Brad Pitt.)

Diamond Girl

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Hair and Toothpaste and Chicago

If you follow me on Twitter, are friends with me on Facebook or stalk me in a red Mini Cooper or whatever, you know I’ve had an interesting 24 hours.  I chopped off my ponytail and went all pixie and then I spiked it up in a thousand directions and now am sorely tempted to put toothpaste in it to get the spikes to stick and then maybe streak it pink.  (Mom and Dad, if you’re reading this: I am completely kidding.)

The pixie, in a slightly more proper state.

I missed the Giants game because it was at a ridiculous time and also, I was in the hair salon.  Chopping that much hair takes a long time, guys.  From what I hear, though, it wasn’t pretty.   Madison Bumgarner wasn’t having the whole Chicago thing at all and San Francisco lost by a final of 6-4.  Yeah, not pretty.  Still, they finish the month of August a round 4.0 games in front of the Dodgers and September means – you guessed it – September call-ups!  Also, It’s September Inside and Maybe Not Outside, but that’s beside the point.  September call-ups are actually one of my favorite parts of the season and not just because they signify Starbucks starts selling pumpkin lattes.  Okay, maybe a little bit because of that.  But mostly, especially when the team is making a playoff run, it’s a lot of fun to see things mixed up a bit.  Six new players will be joining the team tomorrow as the Giants play another unreasonably timed game in Chicago tomorrow.

10am on a Saturday?  Get outta here.  If I do manage to wake up, it’s Lincecum pitching, so it should be interesting.  I hate describing Lincecum starts as “interesting”, but the alternatives are even worse, if slightly more colorful.  Anyhows, I’m just pretending that this August is like That August We Are Not Going to Talk About and Lincecum is going to snap out of it in, oh, two hours and fifty-three minutes.  (When September starts, in case you’re feeling slow or my attempt at humor is falling flat.)

I have to go.  My hair is short and the toothpaste is waiting.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  The Cubs gave away lip balm at today’s game.  Why on earth am I not a Cubs fan?  Alternately, why don’t the Giants do awesome giveaways like that?  Because I’m not all the tempted to become a Cubs fan seeing as, y’know, they’re cursed and stuff.

 

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Why IAmSoExcitedICanBarelyWrite

If you asked me to pinpoint the moment that things started to turn around, I’m not sure I would be able to.  But turn around they have.  After a lovely 2-0 win against the Cubbies yesterday (one more game in that series today, if the rain holds off, which seems doubtful), the Giants sit at 30-24, only 3 games out of the first place Dodgers.

Nothing huge has changed, maybe, but a lot of little things have.  The pitching is just better enough that it’s really, really good and the defense has cleaned its act up, too.  The hitting isn’t blowing up the charts or anything, but it’s tidy.  It is all enough to get wins.  (Against the Cubbies, who are cake, but that’s beside the point.)

Zito has gone a long way towards proving his wonderfulness is not a fluke and everyone else is doing a pretty good job convincing me that the Rest of This Season Which I Block Out Of My Memory was indeed a fluke.

This Monday is kicking off rather nicely, isn’t it?

More importantly (who am I kidding… most importantly):  todayisMLBdraftdayohmygodyesitisexcusemewhileIgodie.  Not really going to go die, don’t worry.  If I died I would miss the draft.  But I am so excited I can barely form a coherent blog post.  Well, my blog posts are never really coherent.  But this one might be less than usual, even, because my fingers are dancing a celebratory dance all their own.  I am doing nothing from 4:00pm onwards, except reaching my hand in and out of the saltwater taffy bowl.  Saltwater taffy and the draft are my personal tradition and a total match made in heaven.

Now I’ll just go get the rest of my jazz done, if nobody objects, so I will be free to vegetate this late afternoon.  Catch y’all later.

Diamond Girl

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