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They Will Pitch Well and Make Us All Gloomy with RISP Stats and Other Predictions for the Coming Months

Hello, darlings, and apologies for my semi-accidental absence.  I ended up spending the weekend lying under a large shady tree just bein’ lazy, as Bing Crosby might say, and watching/listening to baseball in the moments that I was not doing aforementioned laziness.  No time for blogging, see what I mean?

Anyway, now that it’s the last day of the first month of the season and we have an off day at last (thank you, Bud Selig, you’re the best-ish), I am back to break everything down.  April has been a strange month for the Giants, but then again, isn’t it always?  You can’t say any of the games mean anything but it is certainly important in terms of getting to know the team’s personality on the field and often, I think, if you look back at April at the end of the season, you’ll see a lot of things that now look like psychic hints, even if they weren’t the least bit apparent at the time.

So!  I’m just going to go on that hypothesis.  If April tells us everything we need to know about this team, what does that mean for them?   Observe, 2012 Trends for the Gigantes:

Hair Will Disappear

Why would I think this, you ask?  Nod to Timmy’s haircut and Brian Wilson’s season-ending Tommy John surgery.  The hair everywhere trend is so 80s, you know.  The Giants are just now getting clued into this and life has never been better.  In that sense, at least.

The Whole Season Will Feel the Dog Days of August, aka WEIRD

I am staunchly convinced that April felt like August this year, so you probably will not be able to dissuade me, no matter what you try.  If you don’t know what I’m talking about, I direct you to the weird injuries like Buster Posey’s shingles and Aubrey Huff’s anxiety disorder.  Stuff like that is supposed to happen when everyone is wiped out from a long season.  We’re in for that all year, it would seem.  I am going to need to break out my extraordinary multitude of virtual Get Well Soon cards soon.

This Will Be the Year of the Triples

You heard it here first.  Of course, you saw it first on the field with Angel Pagan and Nate Schierholtz and people, but hearing is more important than seeing so I win, in this situation.  Anyhow, I have always been of the opinion that triples are the secret weapon of playing at AT&T Park so they should probably, you know, utilize that.  This year will be the year that Happens with a capital H.

Interleague Play Will Be a Drag

Okay, no proof here.  But it always is, so that’s just a safe assumption, right?  Until they play the Rangers, that is.  That will be wondrous, of course.

They Will Pitch Well and Make Us All Gloomy with RISP Stats

Safe assumption, 2.0.

But really, I am encouraged.  April has not been disastrous, mostly, and blue skies show summer is coming.  Baseball is just getting started.  Restock the orange juice and settle in.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  Yu Darvish is on ESPN tonight which means I can fine-all-ee watch him.  I am so excited you do not even know.  The Rangers were also in ESPN last night, facing the Rays, and I remembered that Jeff Keppinger is with them now.  Remember him, Giants fans?  He had an RBI in the Rays 5-2 victory.  This is Emily’s miffed face, right here.

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Well, That Was Better Than It Could Have Been…

…but also, probably, worse than it could have been.  In Dream Diamond Girl world where blueberry muffins grow on trees and my computer never freezes up.  Ah, Dream Diamond Girl world… okay.  Back to the point.  The Giants finished up the (what feels like endless) roadtrip today in Cinci with a 9th inning comeback – hugs, Angel Pagan – and now have a winning record, at 10-9.  Can you believe we’re 19 games into the season?  And if so, can you believe the Giants have only been on the road for less than a week?  It feels like ages, people.

I want to break it all down, because when there are no off-days, I feel perpetually rushed. 

See, I’m pretty bipolar about off-days.  On the one hand, as I’ve bemoaned before, I loathe them.  No baseball?  Shoot me, please.  On the other hand, the chance to sit back and have a mini-offseason to think things over is rather useful.  On that note…

I case you can’t see that, because my camera does night like text, that reads “Dear Bud Selig, The Giants like off-days, too.  Love, SF Diamond Girl.”

Just throwing that out there.

Anyhow.  The Giants have a pretty strong case of very good stuff and very bad stuff, but not necessarily a lot in the middle.  The Sandoval hit streak gets more amazing and weird and wonderful every day and, as it turns out, Pagan has a bit of a hit streak going as well.  The hitting with RISP numbers are still dismal and the bullpen is facing difficulties as well.  The team hasn’t quite clicked out there, save for a few times, and the minor injuries certainly build up to create trouble.  Freddy Sanchez had a setback in rehab and one series away from May, that raises some pretty serious questions.  (And I’m not talking the “Are you related to Jonathan???” kind of serious questions.”

Mostly, though, I am feeling optimistic.  No, really.  I am.  Three-and-a-half out from the Dodgers and the season is progressing.  Basically aside from Timmy’s struggles, the Giants haven’t had any huge surprises, performance-wise.  They’ve been dismal with RISP for a good long while now and as long as the pitching holds up, they are perfectly good.

And if the pitching doesn’t hold up, well, the NFL draft was today and the season isn’t that far off.  The Niners might compete and stuff, especially if they hire me as GM.  Don’t be too depressed, Giants fans.

Diamond Girl

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Hugs, Bud Selig.

My day started far too early for a Saturday with a Little League game, A’s vs. Giants.  Nothing weird about that, right?  Aside from the fact that the Curse of Interleague Play (hugs, Bud Selig) hasn’t come upon us quite yet.  And the fact that I was rooting for the A’s.  It pained me, I tell you.  But I have people who I have to root for on the A’s, so that was that.  I swallowed my fandom and did it.  I still have a few words to say to the coach who got the Giants – words like, “You should have given that team to me! – but it turned out to be a good thing that I was rooting for them A’s, because they had an unprecedented comeback, went into extra innings and walked off.  I sunburned (duh) but otherwise, things were wonderful.

I came home to the disastrous end to the real Giants game.  Aubrey Huff played second base and pigs flew, as did Ryan Theriot, but it was too late.  He’s terribly ill, apparently, and just flew into NY today, but is still not well enough to play.  Since the rest of the Giants bench seems to have been mysteriously transported to a galaxy far, far away/the Hundred Acre Wood/Middle Earth, Huff ended up at second.  Need I really say more?   Moving right along.

 Then Philip I-Am-This-Close-To-Remembering-His-Last-Name pitched the 21st perfect game in the history of MLB (yeah, hugs, Bud Selig) for the Chicago White Sox, against the Seattle Mariners.  That was something and by something I mean absolutely perfect.  Literally.  You know what I mean.

Then Jennifer Hudson went through airport security… oh.  Sorry.  Just surfing the front of the news as I write and there’s a story about Jennifer Hudson and the TSA.  News, y’all.  Can I please blame this on Bud Selig?  No?  He wasn’t involved with the TSA?  You lie.  I am quite positive he was.

Anywho.  Then the Yankees had some sort of a brilliant comeback that I followed on and off while I drank orange juice because we’re having a heatwave over here and there is nothing better to soothe the horribleness of a heatwave than orange juice. 

This is all to say, it has been a strange and busy, but mostly strange, day in baseball.  Flyballs are falling out of my ears and when I try to talk about unrelated things, baseball similes are creeping their way in.  So I think I’m going to cut it off right here and nap and eat spinach pizza for a while.  Catch you all (and Bud Selig) later.

Diamond Girl

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When Life Gives You Lemons of the Crystal Ball Sort…

Well, so, yes.  My crystal ball is a lemon.  My prediction that Matt Cain and the Giants would not be able to reach a deal before Opening Day was flatly wrong.

Then again, when life give you lemons, you are supposed to make lemonade.   I’d say Matt Cain’s brand-new extension with the Giants, worth 100 million+ and stretching over five years, is some pretty fantastic lemonade.  Take that, crystal ball.  The timing, of course, was also rather impeccable.  If Giants fans were not already completely amped to have the team back home, we are now completely completely amped.  I am mixed up in a mash of work/write/pack/other assorted random things and cannot make it to AT&T Park tonight, but I can feel the orange-and-black love in the air and it is wonderful.  Matt Cain deserves some pecan rolls and a big ovation.  I can get the pecan rolls out of the way right now, but the ovation may have to wait a bit.  Stay tuned.

Speaking of packing… I am roadtripping in honor of the springtime tomorrow and will be holed up in Dodger-land for Opening Day.  I appreciate your sympathy.  It’s going to be pretty horrible to be surrounded in Dodger Blue all the time, even if it is on a fabulous Malibu beach.

Also, may I just say one quick thing about Ubaldo?  I’m honestly not on either side here, because I have an irrational distaste of Tulo (not completely irrational: remember when he had Party in the USA as his walkup music?) and as much as I do like Jimenez, I think throwing at someone is just bad sportsmanship.  So it’s sort of a pick-your-poison thing for me.  But if Jimenez had to throw at Tulo for some ethical reason that I am unaware of, then I don’t get why he did it at a game when Bud Selig was in attendance.  I mean, was Selig there for the March 29th Rockies-Indians matchup?  Somehow, I doubt it.  (Rockies-Indians in that fascinating, y’all.)  And purely from an evading-justice perspective, I would have suggested to Jimenez that he suggest subtly to his manager to be put in in that game and I suspect he might have gotten a much lighter punishment.  Not that I am aiding and abetting or anything.

Sure, Indians manager Manny Acta said, “Guys do not play different if the Commissioner is at the game.  The majority of the guys didn’t even know he was there,” but I can’t say I believe that.  Who could miss the President-style motorcade and the Brewers pride, radiating all over the stadium?

I kid, I kid…

Diamond Girl

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Opening Day, Bud Selig? (A Photo Story)

(No comments on the messy hair or the lopsided handwriting, people.  I am still under a hot chocolate hangover.  You can’t expect me to actually write straight.)

Diamond Girl

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