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The Non-Literal Stars Aligning

Happy October!  I was ridiculously happy for it to be October, until I checked the weather this morning and… the rest is history.  We’re having a (semi)serious heat wave in the Bay Area and Diamond Girl + heat waves = no bueno.

Then I remembered that today is the day we are going to Beat LA – which is a rhyme, but never mind that – and I went right back to being ridiculously excited.  I was smiling ear to ear, even carrying my 50 pound book bag down the street in 80 degree weather.   (It may not have been 50 pounds or 80 degrees, but, my friends, this is called creative license )  Which is to say, I cannot wait for this thing to get started.  Cannotwait.  My shoulder hurts from the bag, but I’m still stoked.

Across the Bay, there is some serious drama with the A’s-Rangers series kicking off and I guess they could both clinch playoff spots tonight, theoretically, if all the non-literal stars aligned.  It’s not like I am beginning to see the wisdom of the second wildcard, but I am beginning to see the wisdom of the second wildcard.  Nobody tell Bud Selig I said that.

Over on Twitter, Andrew Baggarly put out a few statistics about the Giants, including that they have the fewest home runs in the Majors this year and assuming that doesn’t change over the next couple of days, they’ll be only the fourth team in the live-ball era to make the playoffs with the fewest home runs.  Say, what?  I was surprised by that one.  Not that the Giants hit the fewest bombs.  That was no surprise at all.  I make a little notch in the tree outside my house every time I go to a game and they don’t hit one out (I kid, tree huggers) and it has… oh, a notch for every game I’ve ever been to.  But the latter stat?  That one’s interesting.  Who knew homer-pathetic teams were doomed in the playoff race?   Moneyball 2.0, guys.  The secret ain’t walks.  It’s homers.   Except when you’re the Giants and it’s right now.  So, yeah.  The theory has some flaws.  But still.

Lastly, Cardinals?  After the Giants Beat LA tonight and hand you your playoff spot, I do expect something in return.  I collect Christmas tree ornaments and there’s also this Kate Spade handbag I have my eye on, if you need ideas.  You’re welcome!

Diamond Girl

p.s.  I woke up.  September ended.  (Hey, I only get to make that joke once a year.  Bear with me.)

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OMG, Giants.

The Giants and I had a little texting back-and-forth.  It went like this.  (My texts are in blue.  The Giants texts are in grey.)

We beat LA.  We swept LA.  We took first place from LA.  They kind of took It’s Magic Inside from us but, really, that’s fine, they’re welcome to it.  They’re also welcome to It’s September Inside.  (You don’t say!  Here was me thinking it was a different month inside and outside the stadium.  Nice to hear it’s September inside, too.)

Diamond Girl

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Statistics With Too Many Modifiers and Some Helpful Tips for Ryan Dempster

I am a Giants fan, so I am genetically programmed to like low-scoring games.  Especially when those low-scoring games feature Madison Bumgarner going eight innings, scoreless, and the offense squeezing out enough to just win it by a final of 2-1.  The Sergio-Romo-can’t-deal-with-Hanley-Ramirez-and-D-list-celebrities is a blip on the map.  This series in LA, which is a pretty huge one, couldn’t have gotten off to a better start.  Sure, a little more offense might have induced a little less nail-biting, but overall, the Giants pretty much did what they’ll have to do to win games down the stretch.  Additionally, they took first place in the National League West  – up half a game up from the Dodgers – and set a slightly suspect record.  Per @MLB:  For first time in liveball era, pair of LHPs (Bumgarner & Kershaw) reached double digits in K’s and issued 0 walks in same game.

Which is kind a cool statistic, despite the multitude of modifiers which make it roughly similar to me telling you that I made lemon cupcakes on the third Tuesday in August for the first time ever and expecting you to be really stoked.  Okay, maybe not exactly similar.  But roughly.  Definitely roughly.

Anyhows.  Lincecum is taking the mound tonight, so I’m kind in limbo about how to feel.  I’m just going to try to be mellow and peace out, because that’s what we do in the Bay Area when we’re stressed, right?  No?  Well, it’s worth a try.  The rivalry with the Dodgers is certainly a lot of fun this year, with both teams being in contention again, but I may not think it’s fun at all after tonight.  Right.  Optimism only.  Tonight is going to be fantastic, people!

Lastly, one more thing for GMs to consider before finalizing a deal!  Make sure the player has a current passport and he knows where it is and all that jazz.  Especially if you’re in the American League, but even if you’re not, because Bud Selig does love his Interleague Play, you know.  And if the thing that’s scared the guy away from getting a passport is the dreaded photo, never fear, USA Today has lots of useful tips for that!  Playing Jose Bautista and whoever else is on the Blue Jays, come hither.

Diamond Girl

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Jedi Are Kind of Undercover Hipsters, See

Jedi work slowly and at night and stuff.  They don’t make flashy moves, but they make the best ones all the same.  Jedi don’t trade for Zack Greinke, ‘cause seriously, that’s too mainstream and jedi are kind of undercover hipsters.  They don’t do mainstream.  Wow, this is starting to sound like I’m convincing myself.  Which is stupid, because I’m not worried, not worried at all.  I have complete faith in JD and Sabes.  Complete.  They will work slowly and at night and stuff.  Right?  Right?

Also, Melky did not dope.  I mean, none of us thought he did but then we briefly did, for the two seconds when we read the beginning of that tweet, and then we saw he didn’t.  Complicated, I know.

Also, Beat LA.

Must go now.  There madeleines to be made.  I, um, bake when I’m nervous.

 

Diamond Girl

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