Tag Archives: beard

Fear the Razor and the Moon Might Really Be Made Out Of Blue Cheese

Oh yeah.

Extra inning games and walk-offs tend to bother me, because I think a team should be able to win without ‘em, but that win was really, really good.  It felt like a giant, “Snap out of it!”

I mean, Aubrey’s homer made him kindof/sortof/wecansayitdid snap out of it and we can only hope the same happens for Cody.  And all the Schierholtz /Fontenot wonderfulness is the kind of thing that makes me wear my wacky grin everywhere for a few hours.  But no, they haven’t shut up about his height.  It’s okay.  As long as he’s good, I’ll take it and I’m sure he will too.

Now I’m going to make a bold statement.  You ready?  Need a refill on the popcorn?  Okay.  Get it.  Then hurry back so you can hear my bold statement.  This is it:

People do better without beards.

Cody Ross is example given.  I could go on and on about why psychologically, but physically?  I don’t think it’s rocket science.  I’ve never had a beard (duh factor there) but I imagine it would be kind of uncomfortable, not to mention take a lot of grooming time which takes away from conditioning time, not to mention puts undue stress on your wrists, hands and arms.  Just when Timmy laid off the blowdryer and his hair started looking air-dried that directly correlated to his pitching better.

I know nobody else buys that theory but I dare a beat writer to actually ask him about that.  Just like I dare someone to go take a piece of the moon and eat it and prove it’s not blue cheese, albeit old cheese with no oxygen.  I’m serious.  Okay, I’m not serious about the blue cheese.  But I’m serious about the facial hair/normal hair habits and how that impacts a player.

And… (::looks around, then whispers::) you look better without a beard too.  Fact, Brian Wilson.  Fact.

Worst case scenario?  You end up like this oompa loompa. 

So how about this year the Giants become the clean-shaven team?  Fear the, um, razor?

Diamond Girl

About these ads

Leave a comment

Filed under Dailies

Opening Day, Baby. And Opening Day Baby. And Birthday Presents. Lots of Birthday Presents.

(Disclaimer: there aren’t really lots of birthday presents in here.  Just one.  But I figured no one would click if I said there was just one.)

I am an Opening Day baby.  April 8th is the day.  The start of the regular season is right around then, which might be the best birthday present in the history of humanity on Planet Earth.  Or it might not be.  I haven’t been around that long, but I’m guessing even the cavemen would agree that it’s up there.

And yesterday I made my birthday plans.  In four words:  Fresno Grizzlies opening weekend.  I’m a big Grizzlies fan but I’ve never made it down to Fresno to see them.  2 rows from the field.  I am way, way excited.

Please don’t remind me that I have to make a presentation at 9:30 the next morning.  (Who even makes presentations at 9:30 on a Saturday?  Don’t ask me.  I have no idea.) 

I’ve been reading up on the stadium but if anyone’s been there and has some tips on food or parking, do share.  Or if you know anything about the spa treatment they claim to have.  I am slightly doubtful but cautiously excited about that.  They seem to be a million steps ahead of major league teams in terms of fan experience and promotional nights.  I am not a Twilight person (really, really not) but from what I read that was brilliant last year.  Except for the Red Cross Blood Donation stand.  That was just in poor taste.

Now if you’ll excuse me, Tim Lincecum pitched nearly six innings, one run, struck out seven and I need to go bask in the glow of the best pitching staff in the Majors.  Ciao and hasta la vista and all that.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  To those who asked what I would get Brian Wilson for his birthday, which is today?  I would go with a subtle hint.  A razor.

brian wilson beard.PNG
plus_sign.jpg
razor.jpg


1 Comment

Filed under Dailies

The Rangers Sound Like Foster Children

Well.  That was depressing.

First the earthquake and tsunamis.  Our thoughts and prayers are with all those affected.

And then this article.

David Murphy: “I know for the time Chuck was here, he was an awesome guy. He seemed like he was steering in the right direction… it has been a constant revolving door around here. We’re used to people coming and going.”

Ian Kinsler: “Chuck was a great guy from the times that I talked to him. It seemed like he had some good ideas.  Other than that, I don’t know what happened.”

Michael Young: “I like Chuck.  Chuck is a good guy. Apart from that I don’t have anything to say.”

Jon Daniels: “Nothing has changed.”

Oh.

We all like Chuck.

Chuck is a great guy.

We all have nothing else to say.

He was the coolest CEO around.  He answered his fans on Twitter.  Heck, he had a Twitter at all.

But we are used to people coming and going.

And we have nothing else to say.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  Guess who?  It actually took me a little while.  Hashtag: #badfacialhair.

t magazine.PNG

Leave a comment

Filed under Dailies

10 Things I Love About the Offseason

Not a slow news day!  Huff was resigned to a two year deal, with option for 2013 and Josh Hamilton won the AL MVP Award.  Huge congratulations to him.  I am totally wearing my antlers around town today.

The (sort of) eternal optimist that I am, I decided to come up with 10 Things I Love About the Offseason.  It was actually surprisingly easy.  I’ve discovered there are plenty of things to love about the offseason.  Optimism is good.  And the offseason isn’t too bad either.

10.  The promise of the coming season.  I mean, the Pirates could go to the World Series next year.  Even just a few weeks into season, some hopes start to disappear.  Obviously for Giants fans, we didn’t really want that season to end, but if your team finished anything short of a championship win, the promise of the new season is beautiful.

Capture.JPG

9.  I don’t go through gum as fast, because I’m less on edge.  Being a gum addict for half the year, but it’s nice to have a little respite.

gum.jpg

8.  I’m a bit of a player transaction geek, so I love reading about the GM meetings and the Winter Meetings.  I also love to “oogle the player in his new jersey!” press conferences.

Zito press conference.JPG

7.  I get to slip into the glazed-over-eyes-I-don’t-get-sports-give-me-a-Gucci-handbag-please mode when people are talking about football, basketball or worst, boxing.  I do not get boxing at all.  I would rather shop at The Gap than hear about boxing and I really hate The Gap.  I started hated them even more after the new logo thing.  Graphic designer nightmare.

gap.jpg

6.  Bandwagon fans start to disappear a few weeks into the offseason.  Which is a relief for hardcore people.

 

bandwagon.jpg

5.  I also come across as a semi (believe me, only semi) normal person when I wear my antlers.  It’s almost Christmas time, so I can pass as a Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer enthusiast.  Do those even exist?

rudolph.jpg
antlets.jpg


 4.
 
A new Giants calendar comes out.  The one I currently have has Fred Lewis and other so-pre-Championship-era people on it and I’ve been waiting for the updated, 2011 one to come out.  The old one does, however, feature Wilson sans beard which is a lovely thing.  You win some, you lose some.

calendar.jpg

3.  All the award announcements rule.  As lamely as they’re announced, it’s still a fun and interesting time of year.  We do really need a red carpet award show for MLB, though, as I’ve discussed previously.  I think Bumgarner should go after a Taylor Lautner look- traditional with some hip flair.


taylor-lautner.jpg 

And Jon Daniels should rock a tough look, like Justin Timberlake at the VMA’s.


Justin VMAs 2010.JPG 

And when I open the show, I would, of course, be wearing Carey-Mulligan-similar Prada (2010 Oscars).  Or something vintage, like Penelope Cruz (2009 Oscars).

penelope-cruz-2009-academy-oscar-awards6.jpg
carey_mulligan_oscar_dress.jpg

Would I lose all my blog readers if I did a whole post on what baseball players should wear to a potential MLB red carpet event?

2.  Anyway!  Onwards from clothes!  Well, actually… another good thing about the offseason is that I can go back to wearing colors that compliment my complexion more.  A.K.A., not orange.  I show my pride more subtly in black this time of year.

black dress.jpg
orange dress.jpg

 1.  And last but not least, I love how it makes me appreciate the season.  The season wouldn’t be special without the offseason.  So I’m relishing this for all the reasons above and catching snowflakes on my tongue.  (Well, I would be if it snowed in the Bay Area.  More like catching raindrops on my tongue which is not a superior experience to drinking water, so…)

snowflakes.jpg

So what am I missing on this list?  What do you love about the offseason?

Wishing everyone in the MLBlogs community a lovely Thanksgiving.  No, I will not be hitting the shops on Black Friday.  As much as I love to shop, I hate crowds and can never find anything that fits me even when the stores are totally stocked.  Cyber Monday is more my style.  I’m a Gen Z-er through and through!

Diamond Girl

Leave a comment

Filed under Dailies

Diamond Girl’s Retrospective of the 2010 Season

(Quickly… looking through the This Year in Baseball Awards and it’s so much fun to relive it all.  Armando Galarraga.  I’d forgotten about that, can you believe it?  Roy Oswalt in left.  Ichiro and a teenage girl being the ultimate Teenage Girl.  Dallas Braden’s perfect game.  So many fun moments.  Anyway.  Two quick things.  I’ll try to keep them quick.  First- I saw the Ryan Braun’s catch against the Giants on September 17th is one of the top plays.  To be honest, I’d forgotten all about that too but now I’m remembering what a fun day, a highlight of the 2010 season, it was for me.  And how perfect it was for Ryan to make that catch.  Needless to say, I held my “I Love U, Ryan Braun” sign high.  I’m also campaigning for Jon Daniels for Executive of the Year.  If any of you live in or spend time in Berkeley, you’ll know that someone named Josh Daniels was running for school board in the last election, so there were signs for him all over.  Couldn’t we, in true Bay Area sprit, recycle them and make them say, “Jon Daniels for Executive of the Year”?)

 

One week tomorrow since the Giants became World Series Champions and the 2010 season finished.  Time to do my retrospective.  This collage is my photo highlights of things I’ve written about and done relating to baseball this past season.  This collage is joined by three all-important items:  designer sunglasses, a hairbrush (heart-shaped, no less) and a baseball.

Collage2.jpg

March

Diamond Girl sees video of Zito at Spring Training talking about new socks.  She is puzzled.

Opening Day

Diamond Girl sees Zito’s socks.  She prays that she is hallucinating.

 

Later in April

Diamond Girl visits LA.  LA survives.  Barely.

May

Buster Posey sees ball and hits ball in debut.  World calls NY Times, but Diamond Girl does not.  She is getting a (non-Buster-Posey-themed) pedicure.

June

Diamond Girl gets picture of self with Barry Zito and aforementioned picture sets record for most comments on DG’s Facebook page.  80% female comments.

 

July

When the NL bullpen at the All-Star game goes from a Dodger to a Padre, Diamond Girl begins rooting for the AL.  (Some historians link this to her later switch of allegiances during the World Series.)

 

August

Brian Wilson grows beard.  Male portion of world grows beards, female portion wears fake beards.  Diamond Girl does not.  She is getting a (non-beard-themed) manicure.

September

Tim Lincecum cuts hair.  Diamond Girl calls the NY Times to give a tip on the sensational story but they don’t answer the phone. 
               
Later in September

Diamond Girl luvs u, Ryan Braun.  Ryan Braun ignores.

 

October

Diamond Girl announces that she is rooting for the Rangers in the World Series.  World attempts to call NY Times but they have blocked World’s number, due to the volume of Buster Posey and Cody Ross related calls. 

 

November

Giants win World Series.  World celebrates by setting fires and turning over police cars.  Diamond Girl celebrates by taking off nail polish, straightening hair and eating (non-baseball decorated) vanilla cupcakes.

 

Diamond Girl + World + San Francisco Giants + NY Times live happily ever after.

 

The End.

 

::cue clapping::

Leave a comment

Filed under Dailies