Author Archive
Matt Cain is Human and Bud Selig and Scramble With Friends Agree on Lew Wolff
Today, I:
- Tried to play the word “Lew” in Scramble with Friends. Apparently, that is not a word in Bud Selig’s phone contacts or in the game. “You never call, you never write…” It’s a pity, you know.
- Speed-made applesauce muffins in just about thirteen minutes. I haven’t eaten them yet, so the jury is still out as to whether or not the whole incredible rush thing was a good idea. I will let you guys know tomorrow, of course.
- Found out that Brandon Crawford can do something right. We’re talking 2-run single at perfect moment right. (In other news, he does not look like Zac Efron.)
- Also discovered that Sergio Romo does not enjoy getting in on Everybody Be Awesome Day. It’s okay. I get it. I’m like that too. I mean, not really, but I’m trying to be nice here.
- Came to the fortunate conclusion that other people have dismal defense as well. coughcoughCardinalscoughcoughDefendingWorldChampionscoughcough
- Confirmed that Matt Cain is indeed human. I feel reassured by this, I can’t lie, but am perfectly fine with him going back to his god-like ways in future starts.
- Lastly, realized that my blog would be completely incomprehensible to someone who is not following the Giants/did not follow this game today. Another pity, you know. The shrugging turkey from this fabulous scene in Holiday Inn comes to mind.
Diamond Girl
Sigmund and Aesop Would Have a Field Day With Us
Aesop would have a field day with us Giants fans. (That is my bit of wisdom for the day. You are very welcome. If you are a little puzzled – understandable – then read on.)
Giants fans spent the better part of the last several years, with the exception of a few World Series drunk months, calling for the Giants management to play the young guys. Heck, play the semi-kinda-sorta-not-even-really-all-that-young guys. We all know how Bochy loves his veterans and Sabean has a bit of a penchant for them as well. In 2010, lightening hit a bottle and those veterans were brilliant, brilliant enough to win the team a championship. But as 2011 showed, perhaps, it was just that: lightening in a bottle. Which means it can’t be repeated. So the calling for the young guys started again.
Then partially by necessity (injuries) and maybe partially by design, it happened. 2012 has seen a whole crop of young guys decorating the Major League roster. Observe:
Those are the birthdates of the 25 man roster right now, excluding the pitchers – because nobody has really been calling for young pitchers lately. With a few notable exceptions, they are young, young, young. They are also, to put it rather bluntly, losing games. They are winning some as well and Gregor Blanco, for instance, is performing quite nicely at the moment, but a lot of them are just simply not performing.
Bruce Bochy has made a few variations of the comment “this is a part of young player’s development” and while that feels a little ridiculous at face value, it is also intriguing, I think. The Giants could go out and get some older players off of waivers or through mini-trades, around the deadline, but even if they won with those guys, would it be worth it, exactly? Maybe they need, at this point, to be finding younger players and building a core. They already have a pitching core and an excellent one at that, but otherwise, they just don’t have one. Not to be completely ornery, but if that is what they do, I am happy to wait through a few losing seasons.
Mostly, I think as fans we have to take a moment of respect for the fact they are playing the young guys, they really are. Maybe not the young guys we want them to play, but it’s happening. Sure, Edgar Renteria looks awfully appealing at this very second, but… I kid, I kid.
Moral of the Story: We want what we can’t have.
Come to think of it, Sigmund (Viggo Mortensen as Sigmund, that is) might also have a field day with us.
Diamond Girl
p.s. Currently learning to speak with an Aussie accent, by the way. Because Billy Beane loves his Aussies, it seems, and will totally hire me if he thinks I am one. Good career move, mais non? I mean, good career move and g’day mate and all that.
You Know What?
I think maybe I can tolerate a two game series.
That is Gregor Blanco hitting a tape-measure shot in last night’s game against the Rockies, which San Francisco promptly won by a final of 3-2. It kind of rocked. I sipped my orange tea (which is so good I cannot even put it into words) and wrote the second-to-last chapter in Novel Project That Has A Name But I Can’t Put It Here, Just Because. Second-to-last chapters are no fun at all, so it was rather good timing by Vogey, what with his three-hitter, and all the other people who saw fit to finally awaken from their baseball slumber and squeeze out a win.
Remember the Tale of the Sleeping Offense? For a while there, it was the Tale of the Sleeping Offense and Defense and Probably Pitching, too. But no longer. It’s halftime, Giants fans, and our second half is about to begin.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PE5V4Uzobc
Granted, this is not football (no siree, not football at all otherwise I would obviously not be blogging about it because, guys, I hate football) and the closest to halftime in this li’l analogy would be the All Star Break and it is not the All Star Break yet. Because, I mean, if it were, Interleague Play would be over. And Interleague Play is not over. We still have to suffer through that. So perhaps I should be saving Clint Eastwood for when that’s all over. Or maybe just use him both times, because you can never have too much Clint Eastwood inspiration, right? Right. I completely agree.
Diamond Girl
p.s. Apparently, it’s Greg-ore, not Greg-er. As in Blanco, that is. My earth is shattered due to this news, but I am slowly rebuilding it. Donations appreciated.
10 Reasons I Hate the Terrible Twos
I am not talking the nastiness that children take on at that age. I am talking the terrible twos as in the hideousness we call a two game series, because we have two of them coming up in San Francisco. Why, why, why? Before I head off to watch a Little League game and miss the beginning of this one, I offer you 10 Reasons I Hate the Terrible Twos:
10. The series can tie. I’m not a terribly completive person… okay fine. I kindasorta am. The thought of tying a series is somewhat nauseating to me.
9. Just when I start to get used to a team being in town (because it does take me a little while) and figure out all the new guys in the lineup, boom. They’re on a plane to Tahiti. Or Kansas. Or something.
8. If Carlos Beltran misses one game due to a “barking knee” – whatever the heck that means or boy, am I glad we did not sign the guy with the barking knee because I like to sleep and I live within fifteen miles of San Francisco so I might, you know, hear it at night – that means he may only play one game here. Granted, slightly circumstantial reason, but still.
7. It’s not the baseball way, guys. Shall I play the nostalgia card? Oh yes, I shall.
6. The factual inaccuracies on my blog skyrocket. Observe: I blog about Game 3 and hit “Publish” before I have time to remember, right, there is no game 3. Readers snicker at me and promptly stop being readers of this blog. I go to my lawyers because I want to sue MLB for all of this, but my lawyers tell me my case is weak. Crushed, I go get a job at a fast food restaurant and spend the rest of my life opening frozen French fry packages. All because of two game series.
5. A fairy dies every time there is a two game series. Seriously. (Not seriously seriously. Just seriously.)
4. On the contrary, an angel gets its wings every time MLB contemplates a two game series, but decides against it. Incentives, incentives.
3. No, really, it’s not the baseball way. Nostalgia is an important tool. Martin Lindstrom agrees with me. Or maybe I agree with Martin Lindstrom. I mean, which came first: the egg or the chicken?
2. We don’t get to really know how we match up against them September-hot Rockies and them defending World Champs. Granted, at the end of the two game set, I may be thankful for that. But since we try to be optimistic over here, I am just going to assume the opposite. ‘K? ‘K.
1. My fish gives me the suspicious eyebrow every time I update him on the Giants and there’s a two game series in the future. I might be projecting or something, seeing as fish don’t really have eyebrows, but I still think MLB should take this under consideration.
donotmentionbudseligdonotmentionbudseligdonotmentionbudseligdonotmentionbudselig
Diamond Girl
In Case You Ever Wondered What An Eugenio Velez in a Toy Shop Is Like…
Baseball Sundays are just the best, aren’t they? The Giants won very tidily in Arizona today, by a final of 7-3 and got loads of hits in the process. 14, to be precise. Is that the best or is that the best? After such an up-and-down couple of weeks, a game that just goes down nicely is an anomaly and a welcome one, at that. Gregor Blanco and Brett Pill were the stars of the show and Barry Zito squeezed out a quality start, too. It is games like these that make you think – or, at least, hope – that the squad can work things out. It may not be neat, but it may work. They are back at .500 with 17 wins and 17 losses and they are six games out from the first place Dodgers. Not terribly shabby for May 13th. I think we may make it out alive, after all.
I am watching the Rangers (hopefully) rip through the Angels on ESPN, so I have to get going, but I would like to leave you with this two Mother’s Day stories. This first one comes from the Giants official blog about former Giant Eugenio Velez and it’s a smile-worthy story.
“Pura Eugenia Vancamper named her son after herself, and they always had a particularly close bond. She knew early on that baseball had a hold on him. When she let her three children choose a toy one day at a store, her older son chose a truck, her daughter a doll and Eugenio, still just a toddler, went straight for the plastic bat and ball. She tried to talk him into a tricycle but he insisted on the bat and ball.”
This story, about Texas’ Alexi Ogando, is also wonderfully heart-warming.
“It took five years for that second chance to come, but it did come, and there came a day last July when Fefa Ogando was not cooking in San Pedro de Macoris. She was riding in a truck through Phoenix streets that were lined with baseball fans. Her son was on the back of the truck during the Red Carpet Parade on his way to his first All-Star Game at Chase Field, and the fans were shouting ‘Ogando! Ogando!’
Fefa Ogando turned to Rangers broadcaster Eleno Ornelas and said, ‘They know my son’s name! I can’t believe it. Thank you so much for talking me into coming here!’”
Lastly, of course, our very own Gregor Blanco dedicated his fantastic game to his mother, who passed away six years ago. Bittersweet, but mostly sweet. A very lovely day around Major League baseball. Totally talking about the mother stories, but did I also mention that Nelson Cruz just hit a grand-slam in Texas? Yes. A lovely day.
Diamond Girl
This Is a Roller Coaster.
The Scariest Roller Coaster in the World. Which, according to YouTube is this one, right here.
I think it’s this one, right here.
The End.
Diamond Girl
p.s. Seriously, this blog post is short because I am celebrating a birthday over here, the birthday of the Adorable Little Brother. Admittedly, the only reason I remember his birthday is that it’s the day before Barry Zito’s but I feel bad about that, so I’m trying to be nice to him right now. Catch y’all later. (Just kidding, people. Don’t go calling the Evil Sister Exterminating Squad just yet. My brother plays guitar better than Barry Zito and pitches better than him in 96% of his Giants career, too. I think I’ll keep the little guy.)
Priorities, Priorities
Today, for once, my optimism is not hare-brained. (I so want that phrase to be “hair-brained”, by the way, you do not even know. Said with a hair flip, of course, because hair flips are ze best.) Why? Well, because our very own Madison Bumgarner is on the mound at Chase Field. Aside from his obvious pitching skills, he’s also a darn good hitter and we are in desperate – and I mean desperate – need of a darn good hitter. If it’s the Baby Moose or whatever we call him now who can deliver the spectacular with-RISP-hit, I will not object in the least.
I just Googled “baby moose” and guys, they are seriously strange looking creatures. But I do totally see the resemblance. Okay, maybe “totally” is an overstatement. I kinda see the resemblance.
On a somewhat unrelated note, the Giants announced a tweet-up for this season, meaning a pregame event for their Twitter followers, for those who do not know these things. I was intrigued for a grand total of twenty five seconds, before I saw that “food and drinks will be available for purchase” (can’t lie, I was hoping for free garlic fries) and the tickets are going for a cool $60.00+. Unfortunately, meeting @GiantsFan22222 is not worth that to me. I have cupcake ingredients and fab orange heels to think about and save up for. Not to mention, you know, college and stuff. But a hearty have-fun to everyone who does decide to go!
Excuse me while I slip into my fab orange heels… what? Trying to make you regret your choice? What a thought.
Diamond Girl
p.s. Holy Josh Hamilton 4-Homer night, in case I did not say this before! And also, Holy Tim Lincecum Haircut! Every start, I am surprised by it. It’s beginning (beginning?) to get weird.
For Once, I Really Want to Thank Bud Selig
Did I rejoice too soon? Nah. I don’t think so. Sure, last night contradicted all of the wonderful things I said about the Giants (you’re welcome, you guys, thanks for disproving me) yesterday, but I am still holding onto the ever-thinning thread of optimism.
Let’s make it Beat AZ, shall we? Or, Save Tim Lincecum, maybe? That works, too. Save Us All also works. We may need it. Don’t even mention that it is only May 10th. May 10th or September 30th, this is no fun. I did not sign up for this. (I signed up for Winnie the Pooh balloons and brownies, but that’s another story. I gave up on that long ago.)
I’ve heard that Sabes and Bochy are meeting in Arizona to discuss potential roster moves but as Henry Schulman points out, they probably wouldn’t add a pitcher until after Bumgarner and Cain’s starts. It is being reported that AAA’s own Shane Loux is meeting the team, although he may not be activated for a little while. I’m a little wary of roster moves to be honest because… okay, it’s May 10th. It’s not time for panic moves. I have an overdeveloped sense of fear of the panic move. If there’s a good, viable option, I stand behind that (of course). But just because they’re tail-spinning at the moment doesn’t mean it is time to overhaul. I am too lazy to calculate, but there are many, many days left until the trade deadline and the playoffs don’t start for months and months and, hey, there’s even an extra wildcard.
See? Still hope. And definitely no need for panic moves.
Diamond Girl
Why I Am Now Fabricating Giant-Related Disasters
It is now time to exhale and laugh a little at ourselves for the mass hysteria that has ruled the roost for the past few days. Well, maybe not completely exhale just yet. We are only one game removed from all of that, but what a game it was. A 2-1 victory in Los Angles, dealing Clayton Kershaw his first at-home loss in over a year and playing respectable defense at last, too. There was a bit of clutch hitting and a lot of good pitching. Overall, very encouraging and very calming. Leastways, I felt calmed.
We did not leave unscathed, of course, seeing as Pagan got some sort of a nasty cramp in the eighth, but that was just to be expected, right? No pain, no gain, as my brother reports they preach in Little League. (And you wonder why I didn’t play Little League, guys. Positive mantras and I tend to, er, clash.) Hopefully, this wasn’t that big a pain, though. Bochy says Pagan will be back in a day or two and he was planning to give him a rest today, anyhow.
This feels weird to write, really. There are no horrors to describe or disastrous turns to narrate. I swear, I am this close to inventing a storyline about Ryan Vogelsong’s freak injury as he was combing his hair with a silver comb given to him by a suspicious-looking witch in a cottage in the middle of the forest. The witch was probably jealous, you know, about his amazing good looks and pitching and stuff so she gave him aforementioned poisoned comb.
I mean, do you see the spike in the hair there? I know it’s mostly gel, but a comb has got to involved somewhere too.
See? Now I feel like a Giants blogger again. It’s Disaster Inside and all that.
In all seriousness, though, I am stoked for tonight’s game. I think this is going to continue going swimmingly (hopefullyhopefully) and soon I will become accustomed to It’s Magic Inside and all that. In the purely non-Magic-Johnson sense of the phrase.
Diamond Girl
Can We Have Their Defense, Please?
Now I get that it’s the Astros farm system and everything so they don’t get cool new road jerseys with black piping (hideous) like my Giants but… that defense. I am jealous.
Heck, I am probably jealous of their offense and pitching too, even though I know nothing about either. See, the Giants have (hopefully) hit the low point on the season, with a 9-1 loss in Los Angeles last night, hours after Mota was busted for PEDs. Not only did the bullpen crumble, but the defense seriously did as well. The offense, as seen above, scored one run. Enough said.
Bruce Bochy said, “It looks like we skipped Spring Training,” and I have to agree. Isn’t this is what Extended Spring Training is for? Can whole teams go to Extended Spring Training? If not, they might try consulting with baseball experts/reading baseball blogs with good advice (cough, cough)/sleeping and drinking warm tea/getting help from magical medicine men. That’s not a euphemism for ‘roids, I’m talking real, honest-to-goodness medicine me, old-school. Alternately, they could chain themselves to AT&T Park in protest of some obscure cause and call it a season.
I kid, I kid… sort of.
This is painful to watch, no two ways about it. Hence I only sort of kid. It is going to be a difficult road up, seeing as the farm system has already been cleared out in a lot of ways and there is, of course, nothing to do about the people who have been lost to injury. I am sure different lineups will be tossed around and thrown out onto the field, but mostly, this group is either going to figure it out or they won’t. Personally, I am pretty optimistic. Bad luck can’t last forever, right? This may be the lowest point of the season, but that’s means things can only get better. Probably, at least. I myself am going to cross my fingers and advise against dreaming LA water, because that stuff is terrible. On a slightly unrelated note.
Beat LA. Or rather, Play Baseball Against LA.
Diamond Girl
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