Monthly Archives: April 2012

The Elephant in the Room…

…is (well, duh) Brian Wilson.  Sure, there are the three triples in the past 24 hours and my tweet which totally predicted that after the first one – there is proof – and all of the other questions and comments surrounding the Giants right now, but one piece of news that will most definitely still be news six months from now is the Brian Wilson news.  Brian announced today that he is going to be missing the season, probably getting his second Tommy John surgery and just like that, San Francisco is left without a closer.

In a strange way, nobody seems particularly surprised.  That’s probably because Wilson hasn’t really looked right for some time now and he obviously was in and out in the spring.  Which makes it the elephant in the room, because everyone’s surprisingly quiet.

It could be that this is reminding everyone that life is fleeting and we are all mere mortals or something along those lines, but I think the more likely thing is that we are all measuring the situation with a great deal of curiosity.  After the Giants won the World Series in 2010, the question was often asked, “Who is the one player this team cannot go without in the future?  Who was the special link?”  Often, the answers were Brian Wilson or Buster Posey.  We’re a year-and-a-half removed from that post-World Series haze now and I think a lot of opinions have changed.  But a bit of it still lingers, I would venture, and I think we are all now wondering if those answers will prove true or false. 

It’s April 15th and we’re 9 games into the year.  Assuming we lose Wilson now for the rest of the season as expected, that’s 153 games without him.  I’m not terribly strong at math, but those are a lot of games.  Personally, I have a healthy amout of confidence in Casilla/Hembree/who knows, maybe even Affeldt.  But in a strange way, a month or so early, we’re faced with the same question we were last year, when Buster Posey went down for the year last May.

And I think that question is essentially, Will they grow a new core or will they falter without the old one?  Semi-eternal optimist that I am, I would like to believe the former, but who really knows, until all the cards fall?  (No one.  But that was a rhetorical question, snarky blog readers.)  In the meantime, I am awfully glad to have someone – that is, Angel Pagan – who can hit triples, even if he can’t score actually afterwards.  Triples are too much fun, people, and this is all about the fun, right?  Well, okay, mostly about the fun.  Says Emily through clenched teeth as she runs her fingers through newly straightened hair that she straightened during the extra tense moments of the game today to relieve her jumpy nerves.  Perhaps I am not a source on this.

Diamond Girl

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A Few Haikus for the Occasion

The occasion being that the Giants are back on the shores of McCovey Cove and they appear to have remembered why I predicted them to win the National League West.  Since they don’t want to fail me, (duh, first priority) they are looking fabulous now.  Okay.  On to the haikus.

On Coming Home

the fake falcon scares

away the fearsome seagulls

and the Giants rule


On Matt Cain’s Amazingness

Cain is totally

worth five billion dollars

and then some, also


Miracles Do Happen

the Giants can hit

baseballs, occasionally,

‘tis cause for champagne


But We Love Him Anyway

Barry Zito is

collaborating with Train

where are my earplugs?

Diamond Girl (who is a poet, now, in case you hadn’t noticed)

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When Timmy Got All Zito and Then When We Wished for Just That

I am rarely rendered speechless, but I certainly was last night.  The Giants and Rockies hit like there was no tomorrow, with a final score of 17-8, and the Giants also made cringe-worthy errors like there was no tomorrow.  Not quite sure why you would make cringe-worthy errors if there was no tomorrow, but I obviously do not fully understand the psyche of the Giants just yet.

The game started out disastrously, then looked miraculously wonderful, and then became disastrous all over again.  Despicable Me balloon scene comes to mind.  I optimistically hoped that this year, the Giants would not do any handing-balloon-then-popping-balloon, but apparently not.   I clutched my very delicious orange tea and sniffled over my radio as pitcher after pitcher got shelled and ERAs rose to serious, undeniable danger zone.

Besides all of that, there is Buster Posey’s case of shingles, which is the sort of thing that happens during the Dog Days of August, when everything gets weird, but on April 11th?  Everyone is supposed to be perky and healthy and, you know, getting wins.  Bad luck can’t last forever, though, so I’m just choosing to believe that everyone else is peaking early and our trials now will lead to success later.

And, yeah.  Be the change you want to see in the world.  I am this close to changing my blog name to “Inspirational Quotes Inc.!”

But seriously, if I were going to change my blog name to anything, “Baseball Player’s Haircuts ‘N Things” would probably more appropriate.  Which means, of course, that we need to break down Timmy’s haircut.

I like it.  It suits his long face shape better (I know I talked about this a long time ago, but I can’t seem to find the post at the moment) and changing things up, in a purely non change-up sense, might be just what he needs.  Sure, it didn’t really at all work yesterday, but these sorts of things can take time.  I am from the city with three psychic schools and countless more psychics-for-hire.  I know these sorts of things.

As for the baby giraffe in the room – move over, elephant – there’s his pitching.  There was nothing encouraging about Lincecum’s performance, but I was slightly and strangely encouraged by his quotes afterwards.  From the SF Chronicle: “I don’t think it’s a matter of finding answers per se.  It’s a matter of grinding through it and knowing at some point in the season you’re going to have these.”  This is preferable any day to when Timmy had his Zito phase and went all, “I don’t feel like I’m getting tired. I don’t feel like anything’s broken… I think the key for me is just to get my mental state right and fix what’s going on.”

The irony here, of course, is that if Timmy got all Zito on us right at this moment, we would all rejoice and confetti might very well appear in the skies of San Francisco.  Baseball, you are a very strange game.  Love, Emily.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  I will now allow myself one, “What’s wrong with Timmy?”  Okay.  Done.  Out of my system.  Let’s move on.

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Just When You Think You’ve Got It Down

…it comes out and surprises you.  I am talking about baseball, of course.  (Contrary to what you may think, this is a baseball blog, not a cupcake blog.)  I’ve always been a big believer in the underdog and rooted for Zito through some pretty horrifying starts over the past couple of years, but I can’t lie, at this point, I was not expecting yesterday’s performance.  At all.  “What was yesterday’s performance?” you might ask, if you live under a rock.

Let’s write it out:  a complete game shutout with no walks at Coors Field.  There are all sorts of fabulous statistics I could quote, but just suffice to say, that doesn’t happen.  For Zito or for Coors Field.  Ev-ah.  It was the sort of game that I couldn’t exactly celebrate at the end, because I was pinching myself and making sure I hadn’t accidentally turned my radio to the spoof Giants station.  No such station exists, for the record, but I checked all the same.

So congratulations to Zito.  I’m cautious to start talking Comeback Player of the Year just yet, but the Giants may very need an unlikely hero this year and if Barry can do that, I will rather thrilled.


Caption:  No, you aren’t.

Answer: Yes, I am.  That is, yes, I will be.  Rather thrilled, I mean.  This GIF does not really suit my purposes all that well, but it made me laugh, so I am including it anyway.

Onwards!  Yu Darvish made his MLB debut yesterday and it was a wee bit rocky, but nobody really seems to mind that much.  Because Darvish is just that much fun.  And even if he’s not, Yu jokes are just that much fun.  We can never get rid of him, for just that reason.  The Rangers must have been awfully busy, what with photographing signs with Yu puns on them, but they also managed to reach an extension with Ian Kinsler for five years, worth $75 million.  Which, among other things, means he one-ups the millionaire in Some Like it Hot by about 75 times.  Although, I wonder, does he have a yacht?

Since Tuesdays are officially GIF days here at Diamonds are a Girl’s Best Friend – I decided this a full five seconds ago – and that is a hilariously wonderful movie.

Anyhow, if Ian Kinsler really has 75 million now, he should go out and get a yacht.  Speaking of which, it just occurred to me that Person of the Moment Barry Zito one-ups millionaires by a full, oh, 127 million.  He really needs to get himself a yacht.  Pronto.

Diamond Girl

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Meet the Danger Teams

As those of you who tolerate—I mean, follow- me on Twitter know, today is my birthday.  I ate a red velvet cupcake (luckily the cupcake shop is open on Easter or there would have been hell to pay, people) and watched Mirror Mirror only for Sean Bean’s cameo at the end but ended up enjoying the rest of it equally.  I also walked on the beach and intermittently, nervously listened to my radio.  Even Jon Miller’s even-soothing voice did not disguise the disaster that has been the first three days of the 2012 season for the Giants.  And even my Winnie the Pooh balloons could not soothe me.  The beginning of the season is supposed to be all optimism and that’s a wee bit hard right now for a few teams.  Allow me to illustrate:

See, Giants fans?  We are not the only ones who have yet to pick up a win.  The method in which we have gone about not picking up a win seems particularly gruesome, but it does not (necessarily) imply any deep, horrible truths about the team.  I am quite the pep-talk lady today, because I don’t think some early season nastiness should interfere with my red velvet birthday.  Or your non-red-velvet Sunday, for that matter.  Optimism still lives.  The Giants are a little (a little?) off at the moment, that’s clear, but not much else is.  We will have to wait and see.  Who knows, this might be a bad year vs. Arizona but 2010 was a bad year vs. San Diego and that didn’t turn out so badly.  Everyone has their Achilles Heel/Kryptonite and minus the humidor (and, yeah, the errors and the starting pitching and all that jazz), I am quite confident in the Giants against the Rockies.

And you are too now, right?  I mean, how could you not be when there are Tigger balloons in the vicinity of your cyerspace?

Diamond Girl

And you are too now, right?  I mean, how could you not be when there are Tigger balloons in the vicinity of your cyerspace?


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