Well, he probably was. He lived in a tub on the streets of Athens, for goodness’ sake. That should probably be enough to earn him the title of Certified Cynic.
But the Ultimate Certified Cynic? (Who is, perhaps by coincidence, also the Ultimate Tim Lincecum Fan?)
No, she came about 2397 years later. Her name was Diamond Girl. And she had a dual personality, part of which was very optimistic and nice and rooted for Joey Martinez to have a huge comeback and win a Cy Young Award and the other part of which was… skeptical of Ryan Vogelsong. Very skeptical. You can lynch me now, Giants fans.
It’s not that I don’t want to root for Vogelsong. He’s a completely root-worthy guy and a darn good pitcher, too, but I can’t help wondering if the terrible baseball word “fluke” is at play here (that would be, fluke). Which is awfully cynical of me, but there you have it.
And that’s why when I heard about the two year, $8.3 million the Giants gave him earlier this week, I felt torn. Vogelsong has earned that security fair and square and I don’t doubt that he deserves the deal. I think I just feel that, in some way, this is a sentimental deal on the part of Sabes et al. Good stories only go so far and that’s not very far at all, when we’re talking about the actual playing field.
But you know what? I hope that he comes out over the next two years and completely proves my skepticism wrong and tears it up. Because that would be a good story. And I am rooting for it, in truth.
Forget it, Diogenes of Sinope can have the Ultimate Cynic title back. I am softie at heart.
p.s. You should still sign my petition to help me become the new commish of Major League Baseball. And make all your friends, too. Tempt them with chocolate fudge. Trust me, it works.