When Sabean made the Cabrera/J-Sanch/Person I’ve Never Heard Of trade so early on, he robbed the offseason of a bit of its possible drama. But never fear! There is more (possible) drama to come!
- Maybe Andres Torres will jump around Puerto Rico, shirtless with his jeans rolled up, because that totally worked last year and, you know, built up his muscles and all that.
- Maybe Barry Zito will come to a profound realization that the reason he had a bad season was that he’s not just having fun out there (ah! That must be it! Makes sense!) and he will not attempt to have fun. Sssh, no one clue him into the fact that trying hard to have fun sort of ruins it.
- Maybe Brandon Belt will make a trip to Starbucks for a Frapp and in the 10 minutes he’s there (nobody ever said Starbucks service is fast), get called up and sent down 15 times.
- Maybe Albert Pujols will walk over to San Fran with a sign around his neck like, “Big Bat to the Rescue! Sign moi and I will save the world!”
- Maybe Wilson will… you know… that… no? Forget I said anything.
Okay, enough “maybe”s to feed the American army. And enough drama to fuel the high school in the Princess Diaries for another good twenty books or so.