Monthly Archives: March 2011

I Am Really Mad at Gameday Right Now.

I am really mad at Gameday right now.

They had the nerve to tell me that Eugenio Velez hit a home run when he came up in the ninth inning for the Dodgers against the Giants and therefore created a complex mental quandary for me.  In the end, I cheered.  Only to be told that Gameday was mistaken and it was not, in fact, Velez who hit the home run.  It was Xavier Paul.

Are you kidding me?

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They look nothing alike.  Maybe the people who do Gameday need glasses.  I read this weird article in Teen Vogue with the headline “These frames will have girls everywhere wishing they’d fail their eye exams!”  Yeah.  It was weird.  But I do have some glasses suggestions for them if they do indeed fail the eye exam that should be required after this inexcusable mistake.


Rant done.

Velez does look better in blue, I have to admit though.  It suits his complexion.

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Judge for yourself.

Now I’m getting nostalgic about him.  Remember his walk-off grand slam in the 12th for the Grizzlies?  Watch it here.  Goosebumps.

Better end this post sooner rather than later.  Hats off to Ichiro for making a bigger donation than Sandra Bullock.  That’s class, right there.

Diamond Girl


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Opening Day, Baby. And Opening Day Baby. And Birthday Presents. Lots of Birthday Presents.

(Disclaimer: there aren’t really lots of birthday presents in here.  Just one.  But I figured no one would click if I said there was just one.)

I am an Opening Day baby.  April 8th is the day.  The start of the regular season is right around then, which might be the best birthday present in the history of humanity on Planet Earth.  Or it might not be.  I haven’t been around that long, but I’m guessing even the cavemen would agree that it’s up there.

And yesterday I made my birthday plans.  In four words:  Fresno Grizzlies opening weekend.  I’m a big Grizzlies fan but I’ve never made it down to Fresno to see them.  2 rows from the field.  I am way, way excited.

Please don’t remind me that I have to make a presentation at 9:30 the next morning.  (Who even makes presentations at 9:30 on a Saturday?  Don’t ask me.  I have no idea.) 

I’ve been reading up on the stadium but if anyone’s been there and has some tips on food or parking, do share.  Or if you know anything about the spa treatment they claim to have.  I am slightly doubtful but cautiously excited about that.  They seem to be a million steps ahead of major league teams in terms of fan experience and promotional nights.  I am not a Twilight person (really, really not) but from what I read that was brilliant last year.  Except for the Red Cross Blood Donation stand.  That was just in poor taste.

Now if you’ll excuse me, Tim Lincecum pitched nearly six innings, one run, struck out seven and I need to go bask in the glow of the best pitching staff in the Majors.  Ciao and hasta la vista and all that.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  To those who asked what I would get Brian Wilson for his birthday, which is today?  I would go with a subtle hint.  A razor.

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The Orange and Black Attack Team is Discriminatory and Why Little League Needs General Managers

So today my father was digging through his drawers and found an Orange and Black Attack Team t-shirt that was thrown to me at the stadium last summer.  Why was my t-shirt in his drawer?  Because it’s an Adult Large.  All the shirts they throw are that size.  I personally am 5″1 and it goes down to my ankles.  Which makes it totally useless to me, aside from a super-fashion-faux-pas-dress-thing.  I am offended.  Short people are baseball fans too.  So here’s my proposal:  throw coupons.  Then people can go claim their shirts at a stand in the size of their shirts.  Hey, they might even save some money with people forgetting to claim their t-shirts.  And short people wouldn’t feel discriminated against.


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I went to my brother’s first Little League scrimmage the other day and I started thinking that Little League needs General Managers.  Hear me out before you start snickering.  Here’s why:

There are no trades or free agents in Little League, but starting at AAA level there is a draft.  We all know coaches aren’t really equipped to be drafting, so why not use the GMs for that?  During the season they could sometimes assist the manager about on-field operations and they could walk around in suits with cell phones looking bothered and self-important.  We already have a good number of parents who do that (not pointin’ any fingers here, but…). 

The General Manager might also serve to diffuse the management system which can become a little dictator-like at times.  The manager would handle the real live baseball and the GM would handle the politics.  That’s a full time job in Little League, you know.

So diplomacy skills, a suit and a Blackberry would be required.

Who would be perfect for this job?  Well.  Me.  Cue the duhs.

And I don’t even require a suite of my own.   A little patch of metal bleachers will do.  And some free licorice from the Snack Shack.

Diamond Girl

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The Best Hair Crown Just Went Bye-Bye

The first round of Spring Training cuts happened today and though I am a Hinshaw fan, I have to admit I wasn’t sad for this to happen.  It means we’re a little closer to this whole strange thing that is Spring Training being over.

Spring Training freaks me out because if the team does well, I have this, The teams that do well in Spring Training don’t do well in the real season feeling.  And if the team does badly, it’s all What’s wrong with them?!  They’re going to be terrible!  I am excited about how good the Giants have been so far, but I’m a little tentative.  Not getting my hopes up.  Much.

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CJ Wilson’s new(ish) Twitter profile picture.

You know how in Alice in Wonderland, after the final battle, the crown goes flying from the Red Queen’s head to the White Queen’s and then the Cheshire Cat appears (you can see it at 6:45 here)?  I need someone with evaporating skills to help me with that. 

So.  I need a new Best Hair King.  And I’m taking votes on these three candidates.

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1.  Barry Zito, San Francisco Giants

2.  Gio Gonzalez, Oakland A’s

3.  Neftali Feliz, Texas Rangers (who, for the record, has the best curls ever)

Takin’ votes down there in the comments.  If you vote, I will send you some Aussie hairspray.  Maybe.  Potentially.  Perhaps.

Diamond Girl

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I Have a Problem. A Craving. For A Certain Food From AT&T Park.

Here’s my problem:

After a very long Saturday (whoever said you could chill on Saturday has never met my March 12th, 2011) I got home and crashed.

I was not thinking about the Giants, for once.  Or baseball at all.  Just pillows and blankets and pizza.

But then I started having a craving for a food.  Not just any food.  Cinnamon Roasted Almonds.  The kind they sell warm in paper cones at the Diamond Nuts stands at AT&T Park.  You know how I feel about ballpark food.  On any given day you can find me munching on cold broccoli and drinking from a re-usable water bottle.  The almonds are the only food I get at the park and even those, not every time.  Because they’re not that good.  But last night I had an insane craving for them.  So I went to sleep.

This morning, I woke up and what was the first thing on my mind?  Well, first actually, Why are my clock and my iPod an hour apart?  But then, Cinnamon Roasted Almonds. 

This is getting a little ridiculous so I went to their website.  They’re sold at just about every store that stocks semi-edible things in the Bay Area but I don’t know.  I want them warm and I want them at the ballpark.  (Fill in a whiney teenage girl voice on that last statement.)

Home Opening Day isn’t until April 8th and since Diamond Girl and Lots of Money don’t really fit in the same sentence, I’m guessing I won’t be at the park for a few weeks after that.  Until then, my entire existence may revolve around Roasted Almonds from AT&T Park.  Or maybe I’ll just get over it.

Diamond Girl

p.s.  Giants vs. Rangers again?  Seriously?   Well at least this one ain’t too close.  And what is with the explosion of Giants triples?

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